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[ Plaster Ceiling and dots poke about ]

Plaster Ceiling and dots poke about
Useless bars of non support support the mind above
Lights that don't light, lit white ceiling darkend
By the shadows of the floor, for the shadows spreead
Spread througout the world of mind
Mind nothing for the dirt of darkness cannot be seen
Seeing truth is that the ceiling is a ceiling
The floor is a floor, and nothing more.

A sky, so high, does it end or is it the heavens,
Is the earth the base or the beginning?
Begin to believe, the sky is the earth,
And The earth is the end,
to life the sky shall fall, but the earth shall never rise, so fear not ones demise,
Suprise the sky is full of lies,
Lies laying on the ground, fall no further,
Falling from high, you fall till stoped,
falling up is never falling down, but never truly rising if there is nothing to rise to, no ground to come to, so where does the spirit go?

Author notes

astral contemplation

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Comments


  • candyhamilton
    February 15, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    i kinda got a little lost but thats not the worst thing sometimes its good to get lost in a work of writing but maybe if there was a way to make it a little more clear n direct but keeping the intention

  • The Inc
    February 14, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    You do have an amazing way of putting thoughts
    together upon page after page! This is truly
    unique and creative in expression dear. I would
    suggest a grammar check on : "spreead" in line 4 and
    a title that is appropriate to draw attention to
    this one. Otherwise, a job well done.

    Thanks so much for sharing with us.
    Keep penning!

    ~The INC."


  • Lady Patricia
    February 13, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    My old friend,

    I was baffled through the beginning of this piece, but the all in all gist of it was not lost on me.
    In particular I enjoyed this breif stanza for a reason that... i cannot explain but only feel. The fact that it is so accurate as far as how life is lived these days.

    "A sky, so high, does it end or is it the heavens,
    Is the earth the base or the beginning?
    Begin to believe, the sky is the earth,
    And The earth is the end,"

    I do beleive that while your intention was to repeat a word in the next line, a kind of continuation of it... it's almost... distracting at times. When you use "See" and "Seeing" there is no qualm, but when your line stops at "Mind" and beings with "Mind" it kind of forces to reader, or listen to catch themselves, as if they are afraid they've read a word wrong, or messed up the flow it has.

    It's been a long time, hon.
    do tell, how have you been?

    Lady