The cool night air burns my lungs
I can't get away
There is no where to hide
This is it,
For the last time
I turn around to face my past
What i see was no future,
A smile, a cackling laugh
The rain falls,
For the last time
I lift my head high and say
I am ready
It looked at me then
With a questioning tint
I smile,
For the last time
I'm through running from you
Just let this end
A contest entry
- In the Rain at Night by Eternalsyn16.
600 points, ended February 20, 2008, 21 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Anything Free Verse by Blooming Poet.
300 points, ended March 5, 2008, 24 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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beautiful picture here. Sad but I love it. unique word choice as well.
The cool night air burns my lungs
Great job on that line -
I Love this write! The meaning is deep and so strong...I am sure so many can relate to your words...
"I turn around to face my past
What i see was no future,
A smile, a cackling laugh"...my favorite part...yet the ending is perfect...wonderfully done.
Best to you!
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So true. You ended this perfectly... Wonderful!
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i really liked your poem, it had alot of different meanings to it, i think, and thats always fun to read because no matter what mood your in you can go to a poem like this and find personal meaning in it. really good one here, thanks for entering my contest.
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Bravo!!!
I totally get this. Lol. It's like you have problems and one day you just decide im done dealing with this and I'm not going to run anymore!!!!! This is amazing!!! I love the part "I looked at me then// With a questioning tint// I smile, // For the last time// I'm through running from you (YOUR PROBLEMS RIGHT??)// Just let this end" Great piece. It's so sad and emotional!!!!1 Bravo!!!!
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I"m confused.
Is this about suicide or about facing someone who's been bothering you? Cause the first bit seems all depressive like you want some kind of sympathy or to get laid or something and the last bit sounds like you're about to take someone out. I"m just trying to figure out if that person is you or someone else. If it IS about suicide, I hope you got over what ever hard feelings you were dealing with because killing yourself isn't worth all the hurt that it brings. No matter what you might think at the time, there are alway people who care about you who would be devistated if you were to die. Think about that next time you feel the feelings that fueled this poem. -
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umm its symbolism of troubles i, or others, have been going through and how you finally get to a point that you are just done with it and dont want to "run" away from it anymore.
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