As I sit here with a cup of tea,
huddled under an afghan to keep warm,
I am tired from lack of sleep
nothing new;
my neck hurts
nothing new;
and I feel sorrow from the loss
of a new friend at the nursing home,
a lovely gent, a WW2 vet,
so friendly he was
no family around most of the time
to visit with him,
but we always did.
I know he’s in a much better place
and I’m happy about that,
but saddened by the fact
that I will no longer be able
to see him sitting in his wheelchair
and waving at me when I walk in the door.
When I walk into the nursing home
every day
I face my own mortality
up-front,
nose to nose,
up close and personal.
I see my future sitting right in my face,
what age will do to me,
most likely anyways,
the variety of disease that affect the elderly,
being all alone with no family around
no friends left to visit.
I know this is just a fact of life
but I think we all, at times, feel invincible
and we don’t think about it;
but, with me, I see this fact on a daily basis
and I am learning how to deal with it
learning…..against my will…..
but that’s life.
And that, my dear Az
are my morning thoughts today.
Author notes
just my morning thoughts today, and what I typed out. Very rough. I know I'll probably delete it.
A contest entry
- This is how I feel... by SummerlandRayne.
529 points, ended February 19, 2008, 17 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 16 of 16
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very good.
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Thank you so much 'Talloaks' for reading, the nice comment and the applause. I appreciate it.
blessings
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A strange trip indeed, facing one's own mortality. I came face to face with my own just two weeks ago, having to call 911 for myself. More than anything, the thought of leaving left me sad for my children, whose terrified eyes wrenched my soul more than fear of this death ever could.
Anyway, a strong, emotional poem. Congrats on the trophy and thanks for sharing of yourself so.
peace
doug
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Thank you so much 'Watuwant' for reading, the lovely comment and the applause.
That must have been an awful experience for you and your children! I've been in that spot, too, and can relate well to your statement.
It's been emotionally rough as I go there everyday and 'see the future'...
again, thank you.
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don't you dare delete this.... I will find out.. this is a great poem, that got me to thinking as I was reading through it. you have many good points here. also this is a very sad poem too. My biggest fear in life, isn't dying, its being alone when I die, that's the part that frightens me the most.
great job on this poem.
good luck in the contest.
kat
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Thank you so much 'kat' for the wonderful comment and applause. I am pleased that you liked this - my ramblings...lol.
I think I'm afraid of both.
...unfortunately, no way around the one at all and the 2nd one - I just hope it's fast!!
blessings
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Wow, this is raw and powerful. The stark reality can be sad, I worked in a home for a while and it was always heartbreaking when one passed. You've done a superb job here, don't delete it
very well penned hunni. Best of luck in the contest with it
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Thanks for your wonderful comment and applause 'LadyD'. Az said she wanted 'right now'...lol...and it was one of those mornings.
I am glad you liked this.
best wishes
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Wow, this is so sad. I worked in a nursing home when I was younger, and it made me feel so sad and so sorry for those poor people. They lose their dignity so many times and its heartbreaking. You did an excellent job here. Good luck in the contest.
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Thank you so much 'Devils Reject' for your wonderful comment and applause. I am pleased that you liked this.
It is sad being there every day....you get to know some of them a bit, and then they are gone....and most are alone while they are there. Sad.
blessings
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Brought tears to my eyes! We all have to face our own mortality at times... to see it on a daily basis must be hard. I have friends staring death in the face right now.. and they are only young and it is so sad!
I myself have been suffering a lot lately, but also think 'that's life' and then I see others and their situations and it makes my heart go out to them!
This was such a lovely piece... kinda had a feeling of sadness and weariness to it.. but still a willingness to continue forward come what may....
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Thank you so much 'kiwigirljacks' for such a lovely comment and the applause. Az wanted 'at the moment' writes for this and this is what she got...lol...
I suffer, too and seeing this on a daily basis isn't easy. I lost my dad there in July, my mom is there with Alzheimer's, although she still knows me - just which me, I am not sure but her eyes light up and she smiles at me.....it is very hard. There are some young people there - that is heartbreaking especially as the one young girl has been there 20 years!! I just can't imagine. But I am the last of my family and the only one who can do this...so yes, I am weary and sad.
again, thank you so much.
blessings
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Dont you dare delete this it is very good holy moly knock that thought out of your head and goodluck to you in this contest best wishes and much love
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Starz, thank you very much for that kind comment and the applause.
'this' is very rough, just typed as it came, form prob. lousy, wording could be better....lol....
but I thank you very much for that comment.
best wishes
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And they are wonderfully honest...in the moment! From your mind and heart right to mine. I can feel every word written here so intensely...deeply in the center of who I am. I have thought these same thoughts. We do eventually have to face our own mortality...it is inevitable isn't it? A master crafting of words, of thoughts, of fears and dreads...mostly my dear of reality! And as I began to read...I did picture you my dear friend...with that cup of tea...always!
Blessed be and best of luck...thank you for sharing this with my soul! My prayers are there.
Az -
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Thank you Az for that wonderful comment. This is really rough....know I prob. will not keep it...lol....I would like to do a different one, I think, down the line.
anyways, thanks.
blessings
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