He saw me as I was.
Tie dye stained, vibrant
beneath onyx realities.
My heart didn’t mind him
kindly suffocating me
in his God-like persona.
Our divine union
reigning dreamscapes
where solitude once sleep.
But he never knew me
indigo stricken, empowered,
riding dragon’s wings.
And the fatality, our love
rests ashen, water stricken
beneath my feet
As I glide away.
In a list
Comments
1 - 16 of 16
-
I think i am going to read you rpoetry more often. This is beautifully written. well done.
Grim.
-
Well done! Fluid and full of emotional imagery. It seems to be pride that is the reason we keep things to ourselves.
Love,
Amera
-
Like everyone else seems to like, the ending is really expressive and contains a good chunk of the poem's information. I find this two ways: (1) a one night stand, which sounds less likely since it was my first visual when reading; (2) losing a loved one then recovering. "As I glide away" gives me the feeling that you are swiftly moving away from this love and renewing yourself in a positive way. The poem itself is very vibrant and majestic. Excellent.
M a r l u x i a -
ah the hidden depths we all hold, some see right away the flow of our minds and hearts whilst others never get a glimpse, a good poem.
-
Oy!!
The last line takes the Mind on a chariot ride through the Universe
Love this one!!
and that line:
in his God-like persona...
the energy just took a few strands off my head
Oh My!
Thank You for sharing Your Spirit also Voice~
Many blessings to You in all You do Sweet Soul
Best wishes too
and much love~ Desire~*~
-
Beautiful imagery and the flow is very nice. I like poems that speak to me and this one did so. Nice job with this one!
-
Wow, amazing! Love how it starts, really strong, draws me in and makes me think. I love the use of third person here, like you're either telling the story to someone else or thinking about the events to yourself. I'm not sure which and I like that. Love this:
But he never knew me
indigo stricken, empowered,
riding dragon’s wings.
Like he missed out on really knowing you. I love the last part too, you give an image of disaster but then you glide away to safety I think. I like the use of glide, and how it changes my image. Awesome write. Made me think, see, love it!
-
hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm i remember a piece you and i collaborated on, that was vaguely similar to this one....
or at least that's what it sorta said to me!
"But he never knew me
indigo stricken, empowered,
riding dragon’s wings.
And the fatality, our love
rests ashen, water stricken
beneath my feet
As I glide away. "
sounds like you're letting go of an old love here...
mike -
-
LOL Mike, that collab was no where near anything to this one I believe it was one of renewing love Actually I may still have it in my deleted poems bin where I removed all my work. Hmm. Anyway thanks
-
-
as always your words play well along the tiny wrinkles in my mind, but as is always the case your inner light does shine, brightly so yes
-
And well you should glide away! He missed the boat of knowing a lovely soul in his shallow waters he tread.It's his lose.So deep are the waves of soulful expressions seen in reading this well versed and expressive piece.
-
And the fatality, our love
rests ashen, water stricken
beneath my feet.
As I glide away.
you are travelling from material to divine through the spoeken words...This is amazing write indeed...
-
excellent
the second stanza is amazing, it made me take a deep breath and ponder
not many poets living or dead can create an atmosphere such as this...you can take this write in a few different directions
love your mind girlie
peace and hugs
Muddy
-
-
Funny, I wondered if it was strong enough when I wrote this. (I've the flu so mind is murky) and I thought, I wonder if my psychic soul brother would like this or if it is too weak. And here you are!
-
-
This was so inspiering, and that a fact . At least it is to me. I love this. The way that you made the words go together was a work of art. I so thank you for shareing this. I hope that you will have a really grand day
-
a beautiful write... smooth, directional and interesting....
Adding your comment:
1 - 16 of 16
