Melt me down until I scream
from the heat
painfully aware of the fever of feeling
until the moment that I break
and can relax in its freedom.
But my frozen flesh is numb
with apathetic reasoning
finely skewed and twisted
around the core of nondesire
not caring at its blatant deceit.
Oh God, melt me down,
a cry of monotone inflections
I cannot ask when the lack
is as far down as my motives...
Author notes
Another poem written long ago. Apathy is the killer of poetry; probably why I haven't written anything new in a while.
Comments
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your ability to convey emotion is very good, you convey the idea of aplathy well. i love the idea and image contained within " the fever of feeling" - impressive. Here's to hoping you feel charged up enough to continue writing marvelous explorations, like this one, in the near future. blessings and best wishes, astralshepherd
~r.
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I greatly look forward to that ultimate feeling of relaxation when my soul is free from it's flesh and bone incarceration.
Tired of feeling in limbo, stuck between here 'n there and and waltzing to buzzing of blood sucking insects because that's all that this life has to offer.
And it's hard to get motivated to change when everyday is the same.
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Usually, when I read poems on AP, I always find something to correct or comment about in a constructive way. But, with you, your poetry seems to leave me with my mouth hung wide open and my eyes rereading. It's quite strange. Even stranger how I can relate from the two peoms I've read from you so far. I might have to come back later and read all of your stuff.
Major kudos.
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Beyond Fathoming
Stumbling: You declaration of despair and your plea for relief are shocking. I have experienced moments of despair, but never have I reached the state of despondence. Thank you for sharing your insight and your delicately crafted description desperation:
But my frozen flesh is numb
with apathetic reasoning
finely skewed and twisted
around the core of nondesire
not caring at its blatant deceit.I hope to read more of your poems and learn more about your creativity!
bjarne
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Thank you for your comment! It is appreciated greatly.
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Excellent
Hi Stumbles:
Very fluid, emotive, well constructed; reader can identify their own experience(s) of apathy. Full of honesty; and able to communicate despare.
"a cry of monotone inflections I cannot ask when the lack is as far down as my motives". Very good. But then, the whole poem is an excellent description of the inertia of apathy.
Yes, sometimes the despare is so deep we can't even raise to energy [faith, trust, confidence] to ask the One person what cane help melt us down. That's when we have to confess, "I believe, help thou mine unbelief"
Will 3 claps help apply some external force to over come the inertia?
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