I carry you with me
everday.
Sometimes, you're dressed in black
lost in the background
that holds my past
but I don't allow my mind
to mingle there.
Stay lost, I always tell you
stay lost, and then you fall
into step behind me.
I can't recall your face
(or decipher the fear
that won't let me turn around)
and so you're obscured from mind.
But--
I carry you with me
everyday
Sometimes you run your hands
down my arms
and I shudder
with the reality of
this imaginative contact,
intimate, with a hint of sickness
you wish to pass onto me.
Sometimes I drop my eyes
and I can't see you in front of me
as I run into your fevered embrace
and my own mix of relief
it's common
to carry you with me.
Author notes
I can't seem to write anymore. This is old, though the ending was just written, so I don't know that I ended this with the same intent I had when I began it.
Comments
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"Stay lost, I always tell you
stay lost, and then you fall
into step behind me."
I know the feeling.
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