Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

Elementary ( when poetic devices aren't necessary)






No flowers or chocolates
as Valentine's day present
or verses of the finest poets

There are no haiku or sonnets
dinner in fancy restaurant
no flowers or chocolates

Yet, his concern has no limits
isn't a mere show or a figment
or verses of the finest poets

His heart conveys no dark secrets
soothing truth to ev'ry moment

no flowers or chocolates
are worthy to reveal my secrets

Care isn't within voices vibrant
or verses of the finest poets

As kind thoughts cover all facets
I don't need typical presents
no flowers or chocolates
or verses of the finest poets






Author notes

There are times when a simple word is all we need.
Happy Valentine!

In a list

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 11 of 11

  • voices
    February 23, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    simply...
    well done


  • Blushfulmoon silver member
    February 16, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    excellent~

    What a fanastic Villanelle I have done one so far while here at AP
    Made me pull my hair out...
    Love this one sis
    Hugs
    Susan~~~


  • Peteskid gold member
    February 12, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    very beautiful, words that tell so much and so clearly, simple and lovely...like the hummingbirds...form adds when read...so very nice...PK


  • leander Moderators member
    February 11, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    You got me confoozled big time when you suddenly had three two-line stanzas (whatever the word of that is -> couplet?) instead of two three-line stanzas (if I make any sense to you right now )

    But overall a great, great villanelle


    • Mari Goes gold member
      February 13, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      I like breaking the structure, don't have enough plates to break, so I break lines
      Thanks sweet zooneke!


  • Kitesen
    February 10, 2008

    Edit | Reply


    bettre late than forgotten


  • wattle silver member
    February 10, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Wow what a quality idea you have put into words. I'm from the camp that believes Valentine's day (as we know it) was invented by Hallmark because we needed it. --- You have documented the measure of a relationship. ---- Thank you. (and one more for Mari's Day )

  • Just4u
    February 10, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Love is, within the love
    and not with gifts that come
    For the first is always there
    the second on the run

    Love is the perfect gift
    whenever it is shared
    For then we see depths of them
    and if they truly care

    Hugs...Eddy


  • Yemassee gold member
    February 9, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Beautiful

    Colibri! Haven't seen those in ages! Beautiful background. I think that's my favorite green color. Wow, a Villanelle, that's like a lot of work (he says over-simplifying.)

    It's of course beautiful, as anything that comes from your heart is...

    Anyone who gets this poem for Valentine's is a lucky SOB!

    Your friendship (and that is a very broad spectrum I use it in) is the perfect Valentine gift, and I'm not alone in saying that!

    Now to quote some famous poems (not verbatim

    Tiger, Tiger burning bright,
    in the forest of the night,
    what immortal hand or eye
    framed thy fearful symmetry


    See, be careful what you wish for.

    • Mari Goes gold member
      February 9, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you!
      The BG seems very appropriate to this poem. Such a tiny bird, almost invisible if next to a hawk, yet has an infinite beauty and wonderful meaning

1 - 11 of 11