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Lost soul

beyond the darkness
for all to see
is deep dark pit
inside is a lost soul
searching to find
an untwisted mind

to free his murderous touch

but his soul stays

uncollected

and his mercy is rejected



 

A contest entry

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Comments


  • Immortal Obscurity Greeters member
    May 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Hmmm.... The beginning wasn't all that great, but the end was a punch to the face. Keep this up, and you stand a pretty good chance of taking the crown! Well done, and thank you for entering!

    Laura x


  • bones7
    February 9, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    It has its weak points.
    I was hoping for more.
    Sorry.
    But If you Thin kthe poem I assigned you was crap I can give you a new one.


  • catz Moderators member
    February 9, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is a rather dark write and a very good one. You did a good job working from the prompt you were given. There's an intrigueing sense of mystery in your words... a super write

    Good luck in the contest

    Dee

  • bones7
    February 9, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    http://allpoetry.com/poem/3890251
    Here is your prompt