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Train from Bahrain

 

In the deepest hours of the night

a distant rumble invading dreams

disturbing there my sweetest slumbers

rousing slowly old desires

taken for granted in his eyes…
 
 

Many long years we had believed

that distant trains to parting loves

serenade with rhythmic songs

lyrics that remind us when

love was still a steamy tea... 
 
 

With job commitments he rides the rails...

our lives the rails, parallel,

as parallel, never meet

except at that illusory point

where certainty of life exists... 

 
   

and I, alone, rekindle that

so quickly consumed by heated fires

of passion, the innate combustion

such that fuels the trains that carry

loves away then back again

in pain-rejoicing-pain-filled cycles

commuting in the late-night hours... 

 

Rolling, rolling, clicking, clacking

down the smoking, littered tracks

through small towns and countryside

bringing wonder to his eyes

rekindling wonder as he rides

the ticket that returns to me... 

  
 

What are his thoughts,

of life, of me

as the train rolls from Bahrain

along the busy rails, back

to this, his home for many years;

and to me, with silly fears

that I’m no longer the new-found flower

guaranteed to catch his eye…
 

Long ago I'd greet him noisily

offering what I thought he’d need

now the lights are soft and dim-

the twilight suits the clothes we're in

and what he needs I give to him

just like the train he takes in turn,

without a word…

__________________________________ 

 

 

Author notes

inspired by anecdote from Anna (Anna Emkah)...

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Comments

1 - 7 of 7

  • Gratitude
    August 13

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    Great!

    Great write, somehow melancholy. I love it but I agree with the poet at the bottom of the page. The graphics and odd layout steal from the intensity of the poem. Great write, though, very strong!

  • ecrivain01 silver member
    February 9

    Edit | Reply

    This is very nice ...

    very nice indeed. The few grammatical errors aren't all that glaring, but they did grate on me when reading this. I wish they were fixed as this would be really perfect then.

    Anyway, good job, all in all.



    • wbiro gold member
      February 9
      Edit | Reply
      yes, I confess I haven't had an English class since high school... good for creativity, bad for technical proficiency... I'll have to put my special multifocal spectacles on to find the errors... AH! I see one caused by editing tenses and plurals, always a danger...

  • Anna Emkah
    February 9

    Edit | Reply
    Wow, you made something beautiful of a thought you got from me By reading this poem I got all kinds of images... my relationship with my husband (who is too often elsewhere) and the rails running parallel. There is a similarity, although the rails never touch, my husband and I do! No longer a new-found flower? lol.
    Interesting write.
    Anna.


    • wbiro gold member
      February 9
      Edit | Reply
      lol at the new-found flower- I was striving for a 'mature' tale, where young readers would say, 'wow, I'd like to be there someday...'
  • laxrocks33 silver member
    February 8

    Edit | Reply
    Bravo!
    I felt as though the images and format detracted from the poem itself, which is strong enough to stand alone.
    Otherwise, wonderful piece of writing!

    • wbiro gold member
      February 9
      Edit | Reply
      yes, to graphic or not to graphic, that is the question... I did debate whether to leave the poem plain and let the images draw themselves, but being a lover of graphics I thought I'd give it a stab! ...now that I look at it, I believe the problem is a gender problem, as interesting as that is- I see that the first 'ghosty' picture is more of a 'guy' pic... maybe if the pink-purple pic is first...
1 - 7 of 7