They laugh and play
roll in hay
and always say
five more minutes please
They sing and dance
they have them in France
some wear pants
and other wear skirts and shorts
they fight
and sometimes bite
and cry
and always ask why
who are they you ask
they are children
Hey Ya'll Tell me what ya think please...Thank You
Comments
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I honestly think that this was a little too simple and the rhyming was a bit cliche and unoriginal. I think there is a better way to describe children don't you?
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In regards to 'fair'.. this poem could very well be focused on the cliche's as well as the normalities of children.
It is probably the very reason why the 1st and 3rd stanza's were strongest and the 2nd wasn't. But lets dissect.
They laugh and play <- mhmmm
roll in hay <- a little weaker but still good
and always say
five more minutes please. <- stronger again.
[The second stanza left out)
They fight <- off rhythm from first and second stanza (they fight and ...?)
and sometimes bite
and cry
and always ask why.. <-- and and? It also doesn't connect to the first line like the first stanza did.
Who are they you ask?
they are children. <-- the close was nice.
So I guess we're a bunch of critics.
...
~ Jack
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