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Damn Your Inspiration

I thought about you today
and I faltered at your words
The way you expressed your secret admiration
was enough to make my knees go weak
A dizzy spell in the hallway
as I almost fall on my face.

You're nowhere near me
at the time of my almost stumble
I want to say the phrases back
and watch you swoon in my embrace
A red cheeked flush of color
as I walk the hollow walls.

But you are discreet
and you confuse me in reality
I cut with ink
and leave words burning in your skull
But you don't understand my intentions
and real life leaves me speechless in your wake.

Author notes

"the world is not black and white, but in shades of grey"
V O O D O O E Y E S

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 14 of 14

  • brokenheartedchild
    July 30
    Edit | Reply
    it started out good then I thought it lost it a bit so sorry but no.


  • fairytalelovestory
    October 15, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    ty for entering good luck


  • BehindTheShadow
    September 29, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Very powerful piece, raw with emotion. Great job!


  • delightfulmess silver member
    September 19, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    OOH this is very profound and powerful within its brevity. Heart felt and real.

    Well done and thank you for entering my contest.



    Delila


  • gettingoutofme
    July 9, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is a heart-felt poem to me. I can see myself through this poem and I'm sure most other people can as well. Good luck in my contest.


  • And Hyetal
    May 26, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    http://allpoetry.com/group/info/pinky?stay=1

    contest for the rest of the rounds.


  • unanswered
    April 7, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    beautiful write. I have felt those feelings, I still kinda do. Its flow was effortless. great piece.


  • Rebekah-Ann silver member
    April 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I enjoyed reading this peace so much. My favorite lines were:
    "I cut with ink
    and leave words burning in your skull"

    Thank you very much for entering my contest!

    Becks


  • Immortal Obscurity gold member
    March 24, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Hmmmm... I was your age once, and can relate to the love aspect of this in some strange way. I do like the analogy of 'cutting with ink'. As writers, that is what most of us do; keep quiet while our pens do the bleeding from the darkest abscesses of our souls. I definitely enjoyed your entry... Thanks for sharing, and good luck!

    Laura xxx


  • LadyDementia gold member
    March 15, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Congrats on the gold!

    Wow fab poem. I especially like the last verse, had some great visuals dancing in my mind there. Very well penned, all the best in the contest


  • acari27 gold member
    March 7, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    wow, great...i loved

    But you are discreet
    and you confuse me in reality
    I cut with ink
    and leave words burning in your skull
    But you don't understand my intentions
    and real life leaves me speechless in your wake.


  • Melissa Burns
    March 6, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    (searches for socks)

    This is exactly what I was looking for - clear, powerful words strung together to get a message out. Loved it!


  • LadyOfFate
    February 23, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    sounds like a love poem but also like someone who is like a model for a painter. they love it and love to inspire the painter even though the painter doesn't see them but their form. nicely done. good luck


  • De-Throned
    February 14, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    It was a good poem... except in the first stanza you put week instead of weak.. lol thats ok though... It was very good at showing your emotions.. My favorite part was the last couple of lines:
    I cut with ink
    and leave words burning in your skull
    But you don't understand my intentions
    and real life leaves me speechless in your wake
    In those couple lines is so much emotion. Thank you for entering my contest. Good luck

1 - 14 of 14