No one listens no one cares
I yell and Scream
But no ones there
Only I hear my screams
As they bounce off the walls
I kick and flail
Theres no way out
Only the walls
They keep me held
Here in this box
Wanting someone
To see inside
How much I hurt
Even when they
Are around me
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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Good job on this ...
but I hope things are better now. You might want to put an apostrophe here: no one's there (line 3).
otherwise, you've done fine. Normally I don't read poems without punctuation as they irritate me, but this one didn't seem to bother me reading it. Perhaps it's because it made perfect sense to me.
I hope life has leveled out for you by now.
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good job!
good write will..i know how you feel. thanks for sharing
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wow william, this is deep...keep it up i like it..love and miss ya!
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How true
We look at all the world from a humanity that no longer care about the people around us. In the same breath we no longer value the individual. Nor do we see our peers as person we need. As a society we just keep lopping off limbs until the body(society)no longer functions properly. Great write. -
this rox
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I felt exactly like this all through high school, still do sometimes. I would feel like I could drop dead in the middle of an assembly and no one would notice, and no one seemed to care... Very beautiful piece.
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i know exactly how you feel.
hold strong, buddy.
just one technical thing - 'Scream' is capitalised in the second line and that kinad disrupt the flow.
all in all, good poem.
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... the unexplainable ...
the intimidating truth - no matter how hard you try,
no matter how strong you are - no one will ever truly understand - and so they underestimate the pain...
THAT .. is what catches us between the hate and frustration of the fact...
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In the first stanza, it seems almost as if you scream just for the company, which supports the theme of being alone. The repition of the walls in the second verse made them seem, instead of overused, reinforced.
The overall message I got was being caged and having people all around you, but no one who cares enough, or that they can't see and you can't get their attention, because you are, essentially, in a box.
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I'm always here for you will although we don't talk much anymore... you have my number so call if you need to talk
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this is very well written like the rest of your work...its nice to read one of your poems again.
Sasey & sekjfes k(ryan)
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I like this, GREAT expressions. You've always been a wonderful writer. Def. keep it up
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