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Deep Within

 

Deep Within

My soul is deep within the glass,
reflections of a simple lass.
Appearing with such clarity,
my other self is calling me.

She told me that I must decide
and beckoned me to step inside.
To follow her beyond the sea,
my other self is calling me.

It happened on a sandy beach
a secret door within my reach.
A magic door to set me free,
my other self is calling me.

My soul is deep within the glass,
my other self is calling me.

 

 

 

 

 

Author notes

Kyrielle Sonnet:
A Kyrielle Sonnet consists of 14 lines (three rhyming quatrain stanzas and a non-rhyming couplet). Just like the traditional Kyrielle poem, the Kyrielle Sonnet also has a repeating line or phrase as a refrain (usually appearing as the last line of each stanza). Each line within the Kyrielle Sonnet consists of only eight syllables. French poetry forms have a tendency to link back to the beginning of the poem, so common practice is to use the first and last line of the first quatrain as the ending couplet. This would also re-enforce the refrain within the poem. Therefore, a good rhyming scheme
for a Kyrielle Sonnet would be:
AabB, ccbB, ddbB, AB -or- AbaB, cbcB, dbdB, AB.

In a list

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 26 of 26

  • And Hyetal
    March 15, 2008

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    Imagery: 1 point
    Theme: 1 point
    Use of Form/Flow: 1 point
    Other criteria: 1 point
    Overall Appeal: 1 point

    I love every little bit of this poem. The flow was great and I love the theme. And you always impress me with your forms. Everything was wonderful.

    ~Cassie


  • Idle Mind Wondering silver member
    March 6, 2008
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    The Kyrielle Sonnet, one of my favorite sonnets. and an excellent example too. best of luck


  • malmadre gold member
    February 9, 2008

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    A beautiful illustration both the picture and the content of the poem, and with each reading of you, I learn more of style and form, I am so glad that you always include the explanation of the form.
    Pertaining to content, life experiences make us who we are and depending on situations and who we are in the company of, we are influenced and shaped until we no longer even resemble the person we start out as.
    Again.. a very thoughtful inspiring poem!


    • Amera gold member
      February 9, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you for the wonderful commemt.


  • Whispering Wind Moderators member
    February 8, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    My beautiful Little Form Queen...this is so wonderfully sweet...you at your best! Inside and out...wow I stand in AWE! of your talent


  • Whoochi gold member
    February 7, 2008

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    Great insight to self...the inner you is just as beautiful as the outer you for sure DOLLFACE! Dammm you do this sonnet well...never jealous (ok maybe a bit) just always astounded by the gift you have..... Good luck hunnypie!


  • HeavensDaughter
    February 7, 2008

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    A beautiful poem. Smooth and easy to read! I enjoyed it...and learned something new about poetry, too.

  • Papagallo
    February 7, 2008

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    My Gosh

    How did I miss this? Too much sweet tea, I guess. This is a beautiful an dpersonal poem. Sometimes I talk with my otherself, but get no answers. You do seem to love the sonnet. Best of luck in the contest.


    • Amera gold member
      February 7, 2008
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      Yes! The sonnet is my favorite form. I have written most of them but I love the English sonnet the most.


  • penman gold member
    February 6, 2008
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    Excellent

    Oh wow, this is amazing. Such a powerful poem you penned. Best of luck in the contest.


  • scorpio rising
    February 6, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I know that I probably annoy by now, always with complements and such.

    But really...what else can I say?


    This is deep, beautiful and profound


    Is it me or have I noticed a more personal approach as of late?


    I really really like that you know...its an amazing thing to be able to touch another soul with words written on paper


    I'll stop now...I could go on..but I'll stop now



    never keep it to yourself...always give it to your poetry



    Keep them comin!!



    Much love!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


  • HaleyMary
    February 6, 2008

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    Beautiful write, Sis. Wonderful poetic form. You write sonnets so well. I like the concept of another self in this piece. It seemed metaphorical, like maybe a person having different sides to their personality. Anyway, great write and best of luck in the contest.


  • Pisces Pieces
    February 6, 2008

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    This is really beautiful, I love the way it reads, though I never know quite how to explain that..

    ...you have the most wonderful pictures and then bring them to life with your words, complimenting them...it is truly amazing.

    It sounds like a difficult decision, I hope it all turns out well ♥


  • moonbumps silver member
    February 6, 2008

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    I loved the flow of this poem and the content even more so-you are ace at rhyme-right up my street. Much atmosphere here acentuated by hypnotic graphic. Good luck with this write. xxx Hilly


  • sunny day
    February 6, 2008
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    OOPS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FORGOT THESE GUYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!


  • IT Refugee
    February 6, 2008

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    Your ability to convey these wonderful images in perfect word choice, wrapped up in strict rhythm and structure continues to amaze me. I want to be like you when I grow up.


    • Amera gold member
      February 6, 2008
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      LOL

      That's a riot! You nut! Thanks

  • sunny day
    February 6, 2008

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    Lying within the mirror's reflection our soul calls out to us. Do not see the exterior, look deep and come inside. It is a journey you will never forget. Just like I won't forget this wonderful Kyrielle Sonnet penned at your fingertips. The rhyming and meter are both superb. They opened up that magic door and left me *sighing* at the beauty of these thoughts. Even without the accompanying image this one speaks for itself. Thank you for sharing the gift of your illustrious pen once again and best wishes in the contest. Love you my friend, Joyce


  • Ithica silver member
    February 6, 2008
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    P.S.

    That is a COOL picture... Yes?

  • Ithica silver member
    February 6, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    How perfect! It reminds me of the soul trying to unite with it's shadow self. The one we do and yet we don't want to recognize. Psychologically speaking, I've heard we usually find our shadow selves it the characteristics we despise about other people. Kind of makes sense the more you think about it? Great poem...


  • cricketjeff gold member
    February 6, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Is this OK?

    I see you in your poetry
    That is the world where you are free
    Where you will live an endless time
    Immortal child of perfect rhyme

    The way you fill each form with care
    You spin your words into the air
    A poet with a style sublime
    Immortal child of perfect rhyme

    You look inside your thoughts so deep
    To that more secret self you keep
    To not read you would be a crime
    Immortal child of perfect rhyme

    I see you in your poetry
    Immortal child of perfect rhyme

  • cricketjeff gold member
    February 6, 2008

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    Yummy!!!!!
    At work today so reply in kind will have to wait, but this is you on very top form and definitely will get tribute in kind.


  • Faeryn
    February 6, 2008

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    A great way to start the morning! Awesome Kyrielle sonnet. I love the picture and the repeating line. The ssecond stanza is my favorite.
    -tay


  • michellemybelle gold member
    February 6, 2008

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    This is simply lovely, soulful with beautiful imagery and language. I have never read a Kyrielle, but I must really like them, I loved this.
    blessings,
    Michelle

    • Amera gold member
      February 6, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thank yo so much
      A Kyrielle is a bit different than a Kyrielle Sonnet. You can find the directions for writing both in the lists on my front page. Thanks again for the wonderful comment and the bunnys.


  • PerVirtuous
    February 6, 2008

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    Oh, my! This is a perfect example of a Kyrielle Sonnet! I love how this ties into previous works. The image is very spiritual, yet accessable. A very complex thought penned in a very beautiful and simple way. Brilliant.

1 - 26 of 26