the a t c p t o
n i i a i n carving @t
the //walls\\ inside of me
*
*
* * *
* * * *
you had a mouthful of * STARS * from the start
* *
* * *
* * *
*
new to the city and lights
i took my place by your side.
" would those gorgeous lips be mine "
[.. if only for tonight... ?
~ ~ ~
the ~ mist ~ fades to our faces in odd intervals along the water front
~ ~ ~ as faint cries from above lift our midnight eyes skyward
"i didn't think geese stayed up this late"
(( we lost track of time/ .............
but it still flew by ]]
\ | /
life - FLASHES - before eyes .. ,,,
/ | \ < your eyes turned blue from sea and sky >
can't say what we're thinking right now
can't think how we're feeling right now
and are we ever gonna jump that||||||||||FENCE|||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
an OrChEsTrA of (( dreams ))
i'll be having untill daybreak
[[.. but i'm sorry dear, i must turn into a pumpkin ])
so...
* kiss me how i know you want to
i'll never say a word *
Author notes
the first night we met
In a list
A contest entry
- *Just Be* by Miss Faith.
650 points, ended February 9, 2008, 14 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
break out the shotguns, we're riding to town...
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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I miss you.
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the entire thing is my favorite and you know why...
but I'll just say that the ending sticks with me♥
"* kiss me how i know you want to
i'll never say a word * " -
Breathless but not entirely Speechless
Your words always have a way of leaving me breathless when i read your poetry. When you write, it feels that each individual girl that reads the poem can insert herself into the girl that youre writing about.
I would have to say that my favorite lines in this were:
i took my place by your side.
" would those gorgeous lips be mine "
[.. if only for tonight... ?
It showed emotion and possibly a side of a guy that only a special few ever get to experience.
Keep blowing my mind away babe.
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I still love this.
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this is amazing. so full of anticipation and shared moments. just amazing.
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Interesting poem here
Its a great poem and enjoyed the read very much
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Beautiful metaphorical language, a collection of brilliant lines that unfolds into a story. You took really epic lines and made them connect so well. Really beautiful, difficult poem to write. And of course, the artistic characters are entertaining also. Brilliant poem Good luck!
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Cool, I love this poem and your format rocks. Great, you have amazing talent.
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