Shaken, stirred
and running fast
slipping through the looking glass
[Spirals]
Dark and down it goes
What she'll find there no one knows
Small and weak
she waits and hides
clawing at the monster's binds
She tips and toes
'round shrieks and scares
avoiding all their blood red stares
Eyes that bite
and souls that steal
fueling all that vengeful zeal
Her heart, it pines
it pleads and yearns
for the freedom this looking glass spurns
Will she choose them?
Sit and brood
how her story ends, you conclude.
Author notes
Kind of inspired by Alice but not entirely
I love the prompt "through the looking glass"
Hope you like it!
♥
A contest entry
- DFI Round 3 ~ Through the Looking Glass by And Hyetal.
850 points, ended March 15, 2008, 10 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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Imagery: 1 point
Theme: 1 point
Use of Form/Flow: 1 point
Other criteria: 1 point
Overall Appeal: 1 point
I really like your take on Alice here. I like your rhyming... It sets a contrast with a somewhat dark write. It also adds to the flow.
Interesting write!
~Cassie
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Forgot these
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I would suggest using a lighter coloured font as it is very, very hard to read with this background.
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Sorry about that, I didn't realize how difficult it was to read. Better now I hope.
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No problems now
I like this, it seems very "Alice" but then turns more to reality in the later stanzas, a very good transition.
It flows well and leaves an interesting question at the end.
All in all a good solid write
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