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Never Look Back

his words cut her deeper then any blade ever could
what is a flesh wound to a wounded soul?
he never sees how he hurts her
she never cries out or asks for help

when she sits alone in bed crying 
cutting away her pain
till the sun comes to kiss her head
and tell her that "it will be ok"

so she gets up and makes
his breakfast, building up her walls
doing her best to hide when he comes out to eat
but it can't save her anymore its to late
she's cut to deep

he goes to work
she off to school
to sit in the back of the class
never opening up for fear
the world is just like her father
demanding, controlling
that she will never be worthy
of the love she craves so much

the thought of getting in her car
to drive and not look back
never occurred to her

A contest entry

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    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments

1 - 9 of 9

  • Oleander
    May 2

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    So Sad but Good Writing

    This is a good poem though it's a sad one. It makes you feel the need to reach out to someone, to help her. I think you've got a great talent, the way you've made each line stand out as if the lone voice at last stating the truth of how they feel.


  • fluffatron69
    March 21
    Edit | Reply
    wow... The second line is timelessly original!
    Really good write! I hope you feel better now...


  • whispernthedark Greeters member
    September 6, 2008

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    I love the hope and strength you put in the end. This is a great write, thank you for entering the contest. Good luck.

    ♥
    whisper


  • maralisa silver member
    June 3, 2008

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    his words cut her deeper then any blade ever could
    what is a flesh wound to a wounded soul?
    he cant even see what he does to her
    for she just smiles and lets him
    the night she left
    she let it go every
    bad and unwanted feeling she
    had been dealt by that man
    she left that night a new
    person not a shy little girl
    but a strong woman
    with a good future

    she got in to her car
    and drove to that future
    never looking back
    wonderful poem good luck in the contest


  • Manda Kathryn Greeters member
    June 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Darkly intense, the sadness of this just screams out at me to pay attention and understand
    Well penned


    ♥
    Thank you for your entry in the May Tolerance & Child Abuse Prevention Contest
    Stay safe
    ~Manda


  • XLadyXVengeanceX
    April 10, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    i have goose bumbs, that was awsome!! you have a lot to give to allpoetry i cant wait to read more!!


  • HeavenonEarth
    February 19, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Excellent!

    I know to go through something like this is very difficult and painful. I pray that this very thing does happen, I have many friends that have went through so much trauma from early childhood that when they were able they left the house to either another family member's home or on their own, they changed their lives sooo much that the children had no idea what they had previously went through until they decided to speak of it only to be open, trying to make sure their children would never have anything like that happen to them- awareness does make it easier to avoid. I'm so glad you gave this a new ending..she will be just that also!
    Thank you for meeting the challenge, I wasn't trying to take away from the poetry in the first place it was actually for the person in the poetry
    Much, Much Love and Many Blessings
    ~Joy


  • HeavenonEarth
    February 17, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Abuse is a hard thing to live with suffering in silence. I would like to see this rewritten, not for the contest but for YOU. What really bothered me in this poem is the closing.
    "In a short ten years
    she will be worse then dead"

    I will give you an extra 50 points of my own to make this ending something better for this person. The reason why I would like to see this is because in 10 years this person could be out of the house living a happy life because she decided to change everything about it within 10 years. In ten years she will be her own adult and change her own world. I would love to see this in this poetry just for this person's own sake. I am not taking away from the poetry penned here just wanting to see this person have better than the cards that were dealt to her before she could change or discard her hand(so to speak).
    Thank you for your entry and speaking up against the suffering in silence that does go hand in hand with malevolence/abuse. Bless you for this and allowing others to see that they are not alone. You will help many for what you will do..
    Much Love, Respect, Healing and Blessings for you~
    ~Joy
    P.S. If you do decide to rewrite it please message me and I will take another look that way I can give you the extra 50


  • Dutch Doll
    February 6, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    that's not cool hope my kids don't feel like that about me later on but I don't plan on being evil so sorry that you feel this way

1 - 9 of 9