You could just SCREAM !
You remain in muffled silence
feigning artificial solace
to disguise the throbbing, pounding in your head.
Your blood began to boil
in the heat of your turmoil;
The imprisoned beast must have its hunger fed.
That jealous rage within you
laying dormant, but continues
to grow stronger in its quest to gain release.
You can feel its growing power
with the passing of the hour
and its fury will be vile when it's unleashed.
That devil deep inside you
spawned its birth when you were lied to
and the monster reared its embryonic head.
And now, it's quickly growing
in the seeds of hate you're sowing
when you found your lover in another's bed!
It will soon be liberated
with its sharpened teeth serrated
to devour its feast of unsuspecting prey.
It is then that you can savor
sweet revenge for their behavior.
That 'Jealous Feast' is your Thanksgiving Day!
But, until then---You could just SCREAM !
Author notes
Picture Credit: "href="http://www.acr.net.au/~davidandjane/1-denial.jpg" mce_href="http://www.acr.net.au/~davidandjdenial.jpg">http://www.acr.net.au/~davidandjane/1-denial.jpg
This is about pent-up rage after you were betrayed!!
"Jealousy"-(The "Green-Eyed Monster") is spawned and your inner-rage is about to be released!
You are "Hurt"--You are "Mad"---You've been holding it in for a long time, but now, you're going to release your fury at the ones that hurt you!--
The pressure has been building up--Now it's about to be unleashed!
In a list
A contest entry
- Picture prompt by creationsfromheart.
450 points, ended February 8, 2008, 20 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Give Me Your Personal Best #10 (Prewrites Allowed) by aGent Lemon.
360 points, ended March 13, 2008, 34 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - A Lot of Nothingness (Options) by AddictingAccident.
600 points, ended March 29, 2008, 9 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Give me the emotion I want from you. by LivingxXxProof.
800 points, ended June 24, 2008, 19 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - SCREAM....If that'll make you feel better! I did by Ephiphany.
1300 points, ended July 1, 2008, 10 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Enter Your Best!!! (Pws allowed and more than one poem) by Intricate Wordsmith.
450 points, ended August 22, 2008, 13 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Gold For Gold by Diminished Capacity.
400 points, ended August 4, 7 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 39 of 39
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Creative
This is powerful,this is a very striking poem.Thank you for entering my contest,I like this piece so very much.
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Wow, so much feeling inside of me now with this write. Remarkable to say the least. Your rhyme is perfect, I loved this write, thank you so much for entering.
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Wow.. a great poem about the ultimate betrayl. I loved the feeling and the wording you chose for this piece. Great job with it, and thanks for entering.
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I can relate to this poem well. I am a quiet person when it comes to expressed emotions of hate, dislike, envy, sadness, despair, and others within those categories. This poem describes how I feel except for the in bed part. I am so sorry to hear that by the way, but thank you for the GREAT read!!!
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WOW!!!
That is all I can say.
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WOW! I really felt the rage in this poem! I really liked the rhyme scheme you used here, all of it is just fantastic. But I must say the best part is the strong frustration and anger that I felt just by reading this write, marvelously done
-Good Luck -
Breathtaking. Simply remarkable. I don't know what else to say.
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My goodness, I am speechless!
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Wow my friend, I can certainly see why you have all these trophies by this poem..it's absolutely stunning. Your writes have such a wonderful flow to them, almost like a song. I so enjoy your work! This speaks volumes on infidelity and it certainly does make you want to scream when it happens. I'll never understand why anyone would choose to cheat, but it happens so often, sadly.
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Loved the imagery in this.
Wow this is great. Thank you for entering, and good luck.
-e -
Oh I loved this one. It fits perfectly into the love and betrayal spot. I can relate to this so well. To be perfectly honest, this has been the first poem I have read about the green monster. Great write and good luck.
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AMAZING!! yyour flow and rume..impecable. great job!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Wow!! Far out!! That is just wicked!!
I love this so much!! And can so relate to it, my ex being a serial cheater!
This is most excellent!!
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"That devil deep inside you
spawned its birth when you were lied to"
--Amazing line!
I love the rhyme and flow. Imagery was great! I like the pic you chose as your inspiration. It was really compelling and powerful. Thanks for entering and good luck!
+ Jackie -
"That devil deep inside you
spawned its birth when you were lied to"
--Amazing line!
Amazing rhyme and flow. I love the metaphors and imagery in this piece. Well done! Keep up the great work.
And you were right! I could relate. Thanks for sharing.
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Very nice. Wonderful rhyme, wonderful flow, great ransitions from stanza to stanza. Congrats, good luck and thanks for entering =]
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wow! Great poem! Nice, natural rhyme. Good luck in the contest!
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WOW, this's such a great piece & you're just a great poet...
Thnx for entering & Best of Luck
GloriousGift
Heba -
this has really, really good rhyme. so good that i didn't even notice it rhymed until i hit the third stanza!
thank you for entering and best of luck
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I simply love the use of metaphors, The way you used the monster actually shows me how much and big this is for you. I am glad you can write about it and I really hope that you will be able to get through this and come out whole on the other side. All the best in the "Anything goes" contest hosted by Angel of Heaven99.
Becks -
I loved this poem. It was very well written and you could practically SEE the monster. It was a great way to show the hatred and jelousy as somthing ALIVE. Really wonderful. Keep up the great writing!
~EnJeru~
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Very nice poem. Thanks for entering this in the contest. I Loved the idea of using a monster as a metaphor for the hatred that you feel inside, and the revenge that is errupting under your skin. This was a very well written poem, and the flow and rhyme were exceptional. Thanks for entering this again, and good luck in the contest. Best of wishes.
XBlankSillhouette -
Nice!
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You are excellent at rhyme, unlike any I have ever read on this site. Thats for sharring this
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wow thats amazing, thats very good discription and it is not forced at all. I love it!
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very well done it flows perfectly and good use of ryhming bravo!
Goodluck!
~dawn♥ -
So worth the GOLD here!!! Jealousy and Wrath are never a good combination. Well done....You certainly have a way with words!!
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I know exactly how this is, this is about how my whole week has been going. So this poem really got to me and I really like it. Thank you for your entry in my contest and good luck.
~Maria -
very powerful. the point came across clearly to me. i find the images that appeared some what dark. maybe not dark, but not happy either, you know? anyway i liked it alot
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This is a very deep deep piece ... I know what you mean ... and I understand every word that you penned here ... Jealousy is one of the biggest problems in relationships and friendships ... So much rage goes through you and you cannot turn it off ... But this is a very wonderful piece ... thank you for sharing it with me ... you are right ... it is a lot like mine ... I am adding u as a friend ... because I feel like you and I have a lot in common ... I hope to be added as a friend for you too ...
Much Love
♥Jayda♥
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That is true......i don't like that monster though, because I always end up getting hurt too when it emerges. It sure is an ugly monster... =D
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The good old green-eyed monster! You described that bitter emotion so very well! The piece was packed with emotion and penned very well!
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Yes
I've felt the build up of pressure, screamed the muffled scream. It's a large part of the reason I make sure to work out every morning. I need the release.
But if my little bubble hadn't burst a long time ago, I believe your words would make me think and feel it.
Intriguing, Bluebird -
love this poem!!!
i hope you win the contest.
you are very talented.
i will read more.
be well
candice
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Whoah! This one is so savage! The rhyme is so natural, I was swept in to the fantasy land of revenge. Of course, we know that vengeance belongs to the Lord, but man, can i relate to these feelings. My favorite line is "The monster reared its embryonic head." Man, this was powerful. Keep it up, and I wish you much happiness!
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wow...intense! Good rhythm and rhyme...I also like your use of vivid pictures..the monterous devil seeking to devour...very nicely done. Thanks for commenting on our poem "Dandelion's Masquerade." We had fun writing that together for a contest.
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Awesome Take of the prompt Very fitting. I wish you the best of luck with it in the contest.
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wow
the title is totally appropriate for this poem!! the 2nd stanza is my favorite...i can getjeolous sometimes but i don't let it show or get the best of me but i do feel like it wants to come out..awesome write!!!much much love 2 u!! -
THis is wonderful!
I am going to hold another contest for tht pic as many wanted to enter and it filled to quickly and it will be open for prewrites that were written for this same pic.
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