Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

What I See

In these eyes I see someone who's scared
I see someone who looks intensely
With a fire shimmering within the pupil
So much easier to be angry
Than to give in to the temptation of sadness

In these eyes I see someone who's covering something
I see someone who lies to hide their identity
With a feeling of contentment
So much easier to hide in your own shadow
Than to give off the impression that you're falling apart

In these eyes... I see resentment
I see you falling apart from your feet up
Your body crumbles to ashes
And fear overwhelms everything you've created
Everything you thought you could be

In those eyes of yours
I see your innermost problems rushing through the color of your eyes
Like a thousand little kids on a merry-go-round
In the mirror you see nothing but your eyes
You see the truth that lies within you

But everyone else sees the face you've painted to cover it all up
Everyone else sees how tall you walk and how proud you look

No one sees you stumbling like a baby learning to walk
No one sees the tears beyond the smile in your eyes

Author notes

Behind These Eyes

A contest entry

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 10 of 10

  • Betting Roses
    February 7, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    very nice! a little too detailed in some parts and not in others but very good. You see through that mask though. (: everyone has someone that sees the real them it just depends on if they say something about it. Saying something can help someone. Thanks for this beautiful entry.

  • Nanax7
    February 5, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is a very good write. I could see myself as I read this poem. Also reminds me of my son hiding his sorrow behind his coal black eyes. Thank you


  • Mandee K. Martyn
    February 4, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    WOW!! You done an awesome job interpertating what you seen in the eyes. I'm shocked.

    little secret... those eyes in that picture are my eyes and you for the most part hit the nail right on the head. I am extreamly shoked and amazed at how well you described me.

    I also liked how you made everything flow so gracefully and the words you used and the imiagry of a person who has her own inner tourment.

    I absoulty loved this... it was very well written


    • wanderingstarlet
      February 4, 2008

      Edit | Reply
      what can i say, sounds like your more like me than we all thought! cuz i give off that same look, and have all those same thoughts. and i'm pretty good with judge of character

      thanks a bunch, i try my best. good luck in judging


      • Mandee K. Martyn
        February 4, 2008
        Edit | Reply
        Thank you for submitting your poem. and I can really tell that you tried really hard on this... and the effort paied off. You made finalist!!!


  • Dirty and Broken
    February 4, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    wow...that's very good....i love it...


  • -CrimsonTears-
    February 4, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    nice i like it..i could feel the emotion when i read it. nice work...

1 - 10 of 10