[Verse 1]
I try and believe it’s something new
Not a memory I des-per-ate-ly desire
I try and believe it’s meaningful
Not like a throwaway gesture of repentance
I try to convince myself it’s right
As if it’s inevitably destined to be
Reforming the circuit, light the globe
When it’s nothing but instinctual desire
[Pre-Chorus]
Throw away your honour
Surrender all restraint
Trade away your disgust
Dispose of your respect
[Chorus 1]
You don’t really mean it
You’re merely drunk again
To trade away
Your self-respect
It never meant a thing
What did you honestly
Gain from your surrender
Nothing was earnt
Nothing was won
You just fucked again
[Verse 2]
Convincing myself to take the plunge
As if the grave beckons for the next man that comes
Like the fates are passing over me
Ignored like a shadow cast upon the blackness
Like I’m unjudged, as if I’m immune
Like I’m the chosen child of all that is sacred
Like it’s expected, like there’s no guilt
Like I’m a fucking saint, like I’m a fucking jewel
[Pre-Chorus]
[Chorus 2]
You don’t really mean it
You’re merely high again
To trade away
Your sense of self
It doesn’t mean a thing
What do you honestly
Retain and hold dear now
You didn’t fight
You didn’t win
You just lost your face
[Breakdown]
What did you win?
What did you claim?
What did you seek, what did you get,
What did you emerge with?
Was it worth it?
Did you need it?
Did you fucking need to take it
Now all is fucking lost
[Chorus 3]
You don’t really seek it
You’re merely blind again
To cast away
Your self-restraint
The ends don’t meet the means
Why do you honestly
Desire and itch for
You didn’t war
You’ll never see
That you’ve lost your mind
[Chorus 1]
[Chorus 2]
[Outro]
You never meant a thing
You never saw the end
You only saw yourself
And never used your eyes
Author notes
Yup, another song, most likely inspired by the large amount of Tool I've been listening to lately. It may seem a bit thrown-together, and it was when I first started writing, but then I worked out a rather odd, syllable-based structure to all the sections in my head (thanks to Tool, I'm starting to write lyrics outside of standard time signatures). I worked it out quickly after I finished, and it goes as so (completely unintentionally, it's based around the number twelve, as well as around multiples of three and four, which, themselves, can multiply into twelve... hmmm, there's that unconscious mathematical thinking that never seemed to surface in Grade 10 maths exams...):
Verses: Nine-syllable/ twelve-syllable lines alternating.
Pre-Choruses: Six-syllable lines.
Choruses: Two six-syllable lines, followed by two three-syllable lines, followed by a six-syllable line, repeat once.
Breakdown: Two four-syllable lines, followed by one eight-syllable line, followed by one six-syllable line, repeat once.
Outro: Six-syllable lines.
The song's lyrics, as I noticed part-way through writing, shift perspective, from the incriminated to the person who has to unwillingly bear witness and hold the incriminated person responsible. As for the song's message, that's for you to decide.
Anyhow, that's me done for now. Laterz.
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