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Captive Heart

Heart held tightly
in grasp of addiction,
mine to you. . .
You had the power
crush it into powder,
render it useless. . .
and so you did.

Author notes

Thanks for the wonderful dedication!!

Image Credit:: "Heart of Glass" by *starfinder

In a list

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 6 of 6

  • Naridill
    February 9, 2008

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    'You had the power
    crush it into powder'

    Gripping phrasing - very beautiful and intense. A little too descriptive of image but still, captivating.

    Thanks for entering,


  • notorious gold member
    February 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    The least cheesy love-related poem I've ever read

    Loved this--it could have easily been a cheesefest of cliches, but it wasn't. You made this into something worth giving three stars to! =)

    "in grasp of addiction"
    A perfect, unique line.

    Loved how you used the words power and powder in subsequent lines--their similarity in pronunciation is remarkable.

    "render it useless..." (loved the use of the ellipsis, perfect spot for it)
    "and so you did."
    A perfect, heart-shattering ending.

    =)


  • Lady Altheia gold member
    February 1, 2008

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    My heart has broken so many times. i think it is made of glass. Sometimes we end up giving our hearts to the wrong people.


  • quack silver member
    February 1, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    this is sad granny
    i love you


  • x-Black-Butterfly-x gold member
    February 1, 2008

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    i felt i could relate a little to the last 23lines and your words are vivid and captive. best of luck mommy


  • NyteShade
    February 1, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I hated feeling that way, I felt exactly like the last 3 lines in this piece, but its not usless, it did find love again. Good Luck in the contest. your words were vivid and i could see it clearly. nicely done.

1 - 6 of 6