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Abstract Moment



In this abstract moment
standing alone
fighting voice to my demise
~I reside
A shell,
not empty, yet lacking content.
No one to hear my fall
~plummet
wave upon wave.
This restless spirit
~dancing.
Fighting
always fighting.
Air is thin,
visibility nonexistent
yet flickers of life continue
despite unusual circumstances
~And I wonder how

I still stand.

 

 

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A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 10 of 10

  • Whyitt U
    February 14

    Edit | Reply
    I really like this...such beautiful wording(plummet is an awesome word) and the flow is flawless. Bravo!!

    Wyatt xxx


  • going nowhere
    February 14

    Edit | Reply
    'yet flickers of life continue
    despite unusual circumstances'

    yes, i wonder how i still stand...
    wonderful, wonderful write... as always.


  • Swan song gold member
    February 3

    Edit | Reply
    I like it Well written and well formed. The shape of the poem contributes to it in a strange way. Very good indeed. http://ak.imgag.com/imgag/product/thumbs/3125728a.gif" width="38" height="38">


  • Grey Mouser
    February 2

    Edit | Reply
    Many thoughts of the darkness flowing into the world, taking their holds upon the spirit and causing wonder as to how the ability to go on is garnered. With friends and love it can be the reasons to continue and prosper.
    Great write sweetheart.

    Love,
    Mouser

  • Poet-treeman
    February 1

    Edit | Reply
    I had a recent near death experience and this was pretty much what was running through my mind. Good work.

    . Rewarded 4


  • The Ghillie King
    February 1

    Edit | Reply
    This one really hit me on a different level. I was deeply reminded of one of my favorite characters from one of my favorite shows XD.

    The flow was constant and the tone as well, striking an almost empty melancholy.

    So much power and feeling in that last line and I find it was nicely played out.

    Great job on this one.

    Paper Crane

    . Rewarded 6


  • Lexie - gold member
    February 1

    Edit | Reply

    WOW

    this is just fantastic! the depth and sorrow in your words... the whole write has that feeling of gasping for air before the next wave hits
    deeply emotional and gripping piece, i loved every word
    you should be very proud of yourself, this is amazing

    . Rewarded 6


  • RainbowGirl257
    February 1
    Edit | Reply
    wow, a great poem, best of luck with the contest

  • Poetdontknowit
    February 1

    Edit | Reply

    NICE

    I swear you are sitting there reading my very thoughts at this moment in time. Love the background, it seems to travel down our weary mental track, huh? Great write you have penned here.
    SWEET KEEP ON PENNING
    POETDONTKNOWIT

    . Rewarded 4


  • Puppydog gold member
    January 31

    Edit | Reply

    SO, SO SAD!!!

    One often stands alone in life and also when they are among many people, it is truly difficult to find the peace and joy we strive for.

1 - 10 of 10