Words wakened feelings found sleeping within
that touched us deeply as considered truth
rose from our cores and glowed beneath our skins
rhythms and memories bonded to youth;
shown others sharing our worldly place
this undivided breath and sweet water well
that life might indeed show a gentler face,
wanderer’s journey touched love and fell.
Imagine there is a heaven, faith is test for true
the world leaves us cold and blinded by doubt;
his vision was brighter days sun splashed blue
in freedom from fear, when none go without;
imagine, for its there our hopes belong;
know we’ve been graced by a man and his songs.
In a list
A contest entry
- Tribute to John Lennon by ecrivain01.
450 points, ended February 4, 8 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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:))))
so much feelings put into this poem
shown others sharing our worldly place
this undivided breath and sweet water well
that life might indeed show a gentler face,
wanderer’s journey touched love and fell
this line touched me
juliet
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I see nothing wrong in this poem. It is a great poem. Keep writing. My favorite part is
Words wakened feelings found sleeping within
that touched us deeply as considered truth
rose from our cores and glowed beneath our skins.
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Yes. I see ...
that it could be used that way, but I don't think most readers would see the esoteric usage in reading this, but would think just what I did. -
Not bad ...
but the punctuation is not right, and "indeed" is one word in line 7. All in all, though, you've done fairly well.
Thanks for entering.
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