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Apples with Apples

To prove this love true, I'll show, no longer tell
To reach such a heaven, I must first conquer hell
A sorceress to most, you cast your spell
by written word, and soon I fell.

Two who scribe beauties, woo once spoken of
At once they thieve fair lady's love
Choose ocean or sky, below or above
To sink alongside sea creatures or soar with the dove.

With endless fruit to bear, an apple this eye does see
Though bitter citrus orange should never woo thee
For apples should dine with apples, and you with me.
One in the same, not two, where one would be we.

Retreat if you wish, but not to live a lie
Sorrows sad song turns once we, to I
With soaked wings one shall not fly.
Sinking in wet, cursed by this cry.

But apples are to be with apples, this we know
Oranges, tender within, possess a rough shell though
Crisp, solid apple provide the right seed to grow
Fallen far from this tree, I'm taken where the wind may blow.

Where I lay rest is where I shall wait
'til my sweet maiden arrives to open heaven's gate
Though my morals may lie under debate
All is fair in love and hate.

In glory of love, I shall be bold
In wait fair winds alter, hot to cold
Adored so dearly that words couldn't have told
Until you be here to have and hold.

You bear the fruit of which I've yearned
If I be wrong then let knowledge be learned
And persevere we shall, or trees be burned
Roots be withdrawn, but chemistry never unchurned.

Author notes

Unchurned = the opposite of churned.

Figured since it isn't a word that I would make it's definition.

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Comments

1 - 6 of 6

  • punksense
    March 8, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Very well written, but it what do you love about yourself. Please read the contest.


  • EmilyRoseFrank
    January 28, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Oh Joshua. This. Was. Fantastic.

    I loved every line and the flow was amazing. The wording was so...so poetic. Shakespeare would be proud. I loved loved loved this. It was cute and ahhh. Just refreshing to read something simply beautiful.

    "With endless fruit to bear, an apple this eye does see
    Though bitter citrus orange should never woo thee
    For apples should dine with apples, and you with me.
    One in the same, not two, where one would be we.

    Retreat if you wish, but not to live a lie
    Sorrows sad song turns once we, to I
    With soaked wings one shall not fly.
    Sinking in wet, cursed by this cry. "

    Just brilliant. You're writing has improved so much. I can hardly ever find anything I am dissatisfied with when I read. I think you've found what was always inside you to begin with. The challenge is...not to lose it.

    Ah...but before I forget...my only issue is with your use of periods...At the end of a stanza they are okay...but your first stanza shouldn't have so many. really it makes the piece sound choppy. Unless that's what you were going for...otherwise that's my only criticism.

    Keep up the AMAZING work, Joshy.

    <33Emmy


  • Karsis
    January 28, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    I like this.
    Seems strange to hear these words from me, aye?
    Well, actually, I was wondering what you would think if I wrote something to go along with this.
    Not in the same style, but this did give me an idea.
    What do you say?

    Also, well done.

    -Saint

1 - 6 of 6