Break up, Danworthy!
let him set sail
fly over the ocean
to greet a windy gale
Wayward, young apprentice
steady your hand
aim at the heart
do you understand?
Chivalry dies here
young Danworthy has no heart
the Pirate code
stripped him of this art
Henceforth, set out to sea
on a rickety old maiden's hull
to voyage out and never come home
unless ye treasure stores be full.
A contest entry
- Best Poems Ever by Scion.
900 points, ended October 27, 2008, 29 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
-
Very creative! (though I was expecting "D'Habitude")
I like the story you create, very sad and very unfortunate for young Danworthy. I like the imagery and the pirate talk you use.
The punctuation is a little lack, but a little polishing could be done to perfect this great tale.
you're a storyteller to the core, with some clever rhyme I might add. Wonderful, I am speechless after that. Cheers, Scion
Score:
R-9
T-8.8
TH-8.7
S-8.5
U-8.8
G-8.3
Ttl-52.1
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