Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

Dark Days

 

Long decayed smiles
are drowning in pain,
haunted eyes shatter,
screeching out insane.

A wash with confusion,
lucid thoughts betray.
Spinning as you fall,
darkness on display.

Strands wrap your soul,
shrivelled heart swells.
The bone clock chimes,
and opens up your hell.

Within a twisted second,
shattered glass cracks.
Tormented by the hour,
pulse begins to slack.

Dark shackles surround
bound so very tight.
Expiration's dates here,
on this onyx night.

Panting, breathless,
revealing the bone.
Time poured in mist,
becomes your true home.

 

Author notes

4. write to me something dark, something that will make me read it over and over again...
LadyDementia

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 12 of 12

  • PastelMoons gold member
    June 19, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    'Strands wrap your soul'
    Darknes on display'
    Just some of the brillance
    you painted with your pen
    Congrats on the shiny
    Remarkable!!
    ~Pastel


  • Re-invention silver member
    March 29, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    wonderful write indeed... thanks for following the rules and for participating.. loved it...


  • Haunted-Memory silver member
    March 16, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Excellent

    Another excellent poem here. The poetess really knows her wording well and can easily twisted a dark write into a most enjoyable one to be read. Excellent (HM)


  • Dark Otter
    March 15, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Damn, what a vocabulary

    You know the twisted and the dark. Yet, you still have form and rhythm and the tools of a very adept poetess. Your one of the best 'dark' poets here, hands down.


  • Three Doves
    March 14, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Super Write

    A very thought provoking write where I could see myself twisting and falling with all my darkness revealed. A powerful write on the prompt and well worthy of the awards. Congratulations. Peace in light and love. Be well.


  • And Hyetal
    February 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Wow, you certainly wrote well off of this prompt! These other two trophies were well-earned. This poem was dark and powerful and flowed wonderfully.

    I like the background, too!

    Thank you for entering my contest!

    ~Cassie


  • Thedamned77
    February 12, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I was very impressed by this poem. You are a stunning writer. My favorite part was this:

    Within a twisted second,
    shattered glass cracks.
    Tormented by the hour,
    pulse begins to slack.

    Dark shackles surround
    bound so very tight.
    Expiration's dates here,
    on this onyx night.

    I especially liked that instead of saying "dark night" you said "onyx night". SImple words like that can make or break a poem and you defintely made it. thank you so much for entering.


  • quack silver member
    February 10, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    this is really dark and really good
    i love you auntie


  • aboomer silver member
    January 30, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Great wording and images! Congrats on the Silver on this - well deserved.
    I like a lot of the wording in this, so can't pick a favorite line.
    Well done
    good luck in your contest.


  • wingsofgold25 silver member
    January 29, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This was very well written very dark and realy deep.
    Good Job. Thanks for your entry and good luck in the contest.


  • Ravensdark
    January 28, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Beautiful dark imagery, I like the picture it painted on the slate inside my mind.

    The bone clock chimes,
    and opens up your hell

    My favourite lines, ominous........


  • CherryOnTop
    January 27, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is a wondeful dark and intense poem.
    "The bone clock chimes and opens up your hell"I love this because really that is about what it does in real life.Thought provoking and dramatic.Bravo!!!The imagery is outstanding.

1 - 12 of 12