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orange zest

 

 

 

 

 



ardent orange spilled by the sun
passionate lights
reflect upon her nudity
in the sweetest of all nights
she shines in all her splendour
lustfully, bristling and aswoon

and for one night
Autumn becomes Summer
to decant the moon's tangerine flavour

while she grows in ecstasy-
full, royal and exultant

in the spheres awakened delight
lovers, with glazed-eye view
inspired by the glittering orange glow

release passion 'neath the harvest moon

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author notes

Got carried away and went over the 60 words, couldn't help it

In a list

A contest entry

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 19 of 19

  • AutumnGypsy gold member
    June 25
    ?
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    Hoodwink!!

    Over the limit it may be but only by way of it's imagery, what a stunning greation of brevity and perfect images. Well done here and congratulations on your silver trophy


  • Aesthete2000 gold member
    May 1, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    An imaginative, bordering on decadent
    in the sumptuous orange ecstasy,
    description as no Harvest Moon
    has ever before enjoyed!

    Aesthete

  • voices
    April 13, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    sometimes, you are my moon.
    distant yet setting my mood by the way you write sensuality.

    yes, you are quite good with this subject.
  • tara wilson gold member
    February 3, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    congrats on the silver..
  • tara wilson gold member
    February 3, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    this is very, very beautiful imagery - good luck in the contest..




  • Mallig
    February 3, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is completely beautiful, amazing use of the orange color, wonderful descriptive language. Love this!


    • MariGoes gold member
      February 3, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      thank you
      Loved you avatar! Turtles aren't my fav. animals, but those two look in a very well mood, funny and fast, and they can dance!!!

  • poet2angels gold member
    January 29, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Amazing....so filled with beautiful imagery

    "in the spheres awakened delight
    lovers, with glazed-eye view
    inspired by her glittering orange light
    release passion 'neath the harvest moon "

    Lovely!

    Lynda


  • leander Moderators member
    January 28, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    What could one say to this huh...

  • Just4u
    January 27, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Shine on...shine on harvest moon
    Up in the sky, I ain't had no lovin' Since January, February, June or July...

    Yours sure beat the plain on white one here

    Have a lovely week...hugs


  • Kitesen
    January 27, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    no words left.

    Wim


  • forty-one
    January 27, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    That was beautiful! Get carried away all you want to
    if it means such wonderful things will spill from your mind... in tangerine, or whatever other color moves you.

    41


  • Utok Bulinaw
    January 27, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Such passionate images you have here my friend. Love the line: "to decant the moon's tangerine flavour" - elegantly sultry. Best wishes in the contest.


  • Yemassee silver member
    January 27, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    It has all the hallmarks that is your poetry: romance, desire, passion, and that feeling of the moment...and though I'm not sure you know it...that moment is often permeated with impermanence (see the line: "and for one night.")

    "Ardent orange," that's a great beginning, it sets the mood of fiery passion, but this desire is muted, almost like the sun behind the dust and debris that causes it's orange color...so are all the things people go through before they give away to that passion...inhibition and lack of communication, reticence, whatever separates people from the freedom of desire.

    What else is good? "Autumn becomes summer." That's very good. It intimates heat, desire, a re-kindling ofwhat was...or what was wished to be.

    What else? Oh yes, "to decant the moon's tangerine flavour," It's like wringing out something to get at that underlayer of beauty. And of course the imagery of that line foreshadows the last stanza.

    Anything else? Yes...

    "while she grows in ecstasy-
    full, royal and exultant"

    Full like the moon, royal like noble, adding an air of height to her passion and ecstasy, signifying being carried away.

    Anything else? Sure is..."inspired by her glittering orange light." First impression suggests that it's a little arrogant to say she has that kind of power, that it's all dependent on her, then I realized, you didn't mean it like that. What you did mean was that the moon was responsible for the mood, that she was merely the recipient of that beauty which inspired both their passions...no hauteur there.

    So, do you think I liked it?

    • MariGoes gold member
      January 27, 2008

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      You saw this poem just the way I wanted it to be seen!
      If we have to give an award to best comments, you'd sure win. Thank you

  • poetryality silver member
    January 27, 2008

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    This is mouthwatering and surly citrus in nature. There is elegance penned here dear sister. The colors of the moon and Autumn and love are intertwined with an essence that makes me smell the lovely scent of tangerine. Simply Beautiful! I wish you well in this challenge. You deserve the best!


    Much Love Always ♥

    Your Sister, Renee

  • Anfractuous
    January 27, 2008

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    Oh, wow. When I first saw the title I did not expect this. haha. I loved it though. It flows so wonderfully, and you can just picture the romance. XP


  • Peteskid gold member
    January 27, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Thank you for this fine entry into the contest and the best of luck to you in the judging...PK

    Comment in the unmistakable style of Kaibab:

    "oh and love is a feather
    flight in the night
    beneath the orange glow
    and sky touches low and soft
    lovers see beauty of the moon
    in eyes of simmering passion,...

    such excellent verses here"

1 - 19 of 19