Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

In the Looking Glass

In the looking glass
some old lady has usurped
my image...bent old crone,
cheeks like a valley
with rivers running through it.

Gnarled hands that curl
into claws and ache with the rain.

Hair gray, beautiful red gone.
Trembles to her steps.

No more mountains to climb.
No more worlds to conquer...
just waiting for that
last closing of the eyes.

In a list

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments


  • Danna Hobart
    February 8, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    my image...bent old crone
    with cheeks like a valley
    with rivers running through it.

    You could remove the first "with" to avoid the repetition, and it would not change the meaning at all.

    I think we can all relate to that aging image in the mirror. Thank you for entering my contest.


  • x-Black-Butterfly-x gold member
    January 26, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Gnarled hands that curl
    into claws and ache with the rain.

    Hair gray, beautiful red gone.
    Trembles to her steps.

    those lines created the image in my mind and i loved your words but no leaving or ill sulk


  • tawk gold member
    January 26, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    You are so beautiful too me and to so many Please don't leave yet. We have many memories too make as a family. Such vivid imagery. I am in awe

  • Flamecaster
    January 26, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    I'm sure she's still beautiful in someone's eyes...great...good luck....