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Chances




Spilled diamonds
whimpers hallowed pillows,
sweet breath etched whispers;


grown gray from constant cold,
dreary disused glass. 

Feather floating
touching talisman,
blending remembrance, lost chances.




A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 10 of 10

  • AJ Morelli gold member
    February 10, 2008
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    this is beautiful PK...



    al


  • Mallig gold member
    February 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    A marvel of imagery in brevity. I really liked the alliteration and visual of "grown gray from constant cold,
    dreary disused glass."
    Best of luck in the contest!


  • tara wilson gold member
    January 25, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    I thought I read those lines before.


    lol


    • Peteskid gold member
      January 26, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      glad you noticed ... good to be noticed...PK

  • wendymolly
    January 23, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    ...and if you read a few times, it grows on you, great job!

  • wendymolly
    January 23, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Me too, the Imagery is pretty awsome!


  • GettingThroughDark
    January 23, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    I get an image of the surroundings, keep writing...


  • Pamela A Lamppa silver member
    January 23, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Such melancholy feel to this tightly woven piece. I get great images when I read. Nicely done. ~Pamela


  • tara wilson gold member
    January 22, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    you have packed so much imagery into this for twenty five words..I feel the mood of this, those lost chances, after reading this poem, those 'hallowed pillows' - love that..


  • Laura Lamarca gold member
    January 22, 2008

    Edit | Reply

1 - 10 of 10