You were my life.
You were my soul.
When I fell apart,
You made me whole.
you dried each tear
that fell on my cheek
You kept me strong
when I was weak.
But time took it's toll
before our years.
And I have no more love
to dry my tears
A contest entry
- LOVE TO LIVE --LIVE TO LOVE by Purush.
550 points, ended June 27, 2008, 9 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
-
wow! beautiful and sweet! Simple and to the point! I really liked it a lot.
But time took it's toll
before our years.
And I have no more love
to dry my tears
I loved that stanza but i would take out the word "more" because it jolts the flow just a little. Other than that, Good job!
*ME* -
This is beautiful and tender and
the ending is so sad. You did a good
job on this. Good luck in the contest.
-
VERY TOUCHING
YOUR verse really touches the inner chords of my heart.
Beautifully woven
purush
Adding your comment:
