Naked I Stand

A suckling of innocence her spirit is thirsty and yearning.

Eternity is calling.

Destiny reaching in silence stalking and awaiting.

Weeping eternally, she is seeking and struggling

for one more breath of God.

Naked I stand, covered in remorse, for what I have done

to generations unborn.

I am woman, I wanted to dance, walk, live, and be

as God.

Naked I cover myself. Aware of disgrace, I bow my

head down in disbelief.

It is my first wrong.

Author notes

Prompt: Original Sing Contest PIC PROMPT
picture: Talented artist of Deviantart.com

great topic since so much is written about this topic,
and how history has re-told or shaped the story over the
years of this story-original sin in our religious histories.

It's an really interesting google!

A contest entry

Big Points, Big Expectations by Exodus. 4500 points, ended February 4, 2008, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest

Comments

By me, right now

Adding your comment:
Exodus
February 3, 2008

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I agree with Heather [Sulfane] on this breaking the no religion rule.
That said this was an interesting take on the prompt you chose, you had some strong imagery.

Thank you
Naridill
February 3, 2008

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Although, I think, this breaks the no-religion rule. I did find myself liking it but think line nine needs to be changed to 'as man'. But thats my personal opinion on topic.

Thanks for entering,
moluv10
January 24, 2008

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A terrific job you have done with this my sis! Love your take on the prompt. you write with great depth and i love reading your work. best of luck in the contest.
SilverButterfly
January 21, 2008

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wow wow wow!!! what depth in this story of the original sin. This one is made of pure sweet gold!!!

a write to be envied!! and that picture...says so much!

Mary