I Fucked up When I Stopped Pretending

Did it ever mean that much?
Was I just another number on that list?
We stumble inside and my head,
Yeah its telling me that I might've fucked up.

In the back of your brother's car,
He's driving drunk and I'm not buckled up,
You scared? Well I might be too,
But this is the closest I've ever been to you.

I'm lost in my head and I know, Oh I know it will end too fucking soon,
Because I can feel the time slipping by so much faster than it should, and I'm ending, ending too fucking soon.

In that car my life was perfect.
I kept praying for that car to crash,
So you can be the last girl I kiss,
So my life can end just like this.



We stumble inside your room,
Safe again and my head is spinning,
My life is coming back through the escaping bliss,
I sit down and watch as you add my name to that fucking list.

I felt like I might choke,
Waking up cold and alone in your room.
I'll go home with love bites and bruises,
I'll go home again
and wish that it could've ended in the back of your brother's car when he was driving drunk, and I wasn't buckled up.
When I fucked up and realized I wasn't pretending, praying for that car to crash and give me my perfect ending.