The generations of dented shields
Now strewn about the battle plain
Do disservice to their wielders
Soaking in a scarlet rain.
Such eager sense of vindication
For the victors cooks their blood,
As axe hews skull, sword's penetration
Casts a victim in red mud.
No banquet toast, no boast of glory
To be discerned amongst the cries,
Rather a more discordant story
From the cracked and parched throats flies.
These, then, are the only truths, when lords cannot share,
Who point at maps and spew commands from easy gilded chairs.
Author notes
Written November 13th, 2003
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1 - 7 of 7
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I agree...leaders sit in chairs and comfort while the men they order out to battle die and suffer. I think we should send our leaders out to war...especially Bush. But yeah, good poem.
~What a fight, this life I call my own~
*^*synthesthesia*^* -
wow, this is very well written. You've got wonderful imagery. This is like I said, really really well written. Great write!
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Actually, "cooks" is correct, as the subject is "sense" from the first line of that stanza. See, if I rephrase it "such eager sense of vindication cooks the victors' blood" it's clear. But I chose to do it this way. Anyway, I appreciate the effort, I don't often get comments on my grammar and syntax.
Thanks for reading!
- Giovanni
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Very well written poem, here! One small typo: second verse, second line: "victors cooks" should be "victors cook". Other than that, astounding. I love the ending; a very fitting conclusion. It is sad and deals with the more brutal aspects of society...I recently researched WWI and I found, to my amazement, the German Army and the English sang Christmas carols together on Christmas Eve, as though neither party wanted anything to do wit the war...
Thank you for sharing this write.
-morgana
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I really liked this piece, everything written so true. Good flow, rhyme and the sad images brought to my minds eye.
Maybe one day the so called leaders of the world will stand up and realise war is not all they think it is, maybe they should go fight on the front line, maybe then they would think twice before going to war.
Take care
LadyWithASmile
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Excellent
Ah, you've done it again. Poetry...what a lovely way to say "screw the generals"! I really loved this piece: good rhyme structure; good imagery; great flow. Concise but loaded piece of poetry. Excellent. Thanks for sharing this.
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I hear you my friend!
sometimes the politicans need to have a rifle in their hands....
so they can see first hand the pain they cause!
I did enjoy!
Keep penning on!
Bill
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