Do you dread sounds you hear
as shadows slink from light?
Does your heart pump fear
with each creak of the night?
Do you shake like lose chaff
feeling scared and alone?
Can you hear your dark half
counting sins to atone?
What is it like to kill
hold life and death in hand?
Are you numb to that thrill,
do your morals still stand?
Will you beg for a kiss,
your envious heart seething?
Do you recognize bliss
when jealousy’s teething?
Ready for pain to start,
pick the scab off that scar?
Shall I tear at your heart
and show you who you are?
A contest entry
- TEN THOUSAND POINTS OF RHYME (Now 20,000+) Part 9a Feelings by cricketjeff.
1500 points, ended January 29, 2008, 40 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
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Yet another HM for you my friend, one of our most faithful entrants. Looking forward to reading your entries for the Final
All the best and thanks for your continuing support
Jeff and Sue
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Great poem, really liked the ending.
Only line that I didn't love was "Do you shake like loose chaff" which kind of felt like you were just looking for a word to rhyme. Just my opinion though, and the word may hold more meaning than I know.
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I like this -- thought provoking
Good rhythm and rhyming.
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