I think I was four on that warm summer's day
when my brother, aged six, came and asked me to play.
In the shadow-filled lea of our old garden shed,
"I know how to make babies," my wise brother said.
Now I loved all my dollies, always yearning for more,
though I hadn't considered a real baby before!
I innocently asked him to tell what he knew ~
and he whipped out his 'thingy' and peed on my shoe.
I didn't think much of this newfound advice ~
I thought, Poor old Mummy! That's not very nice!
As I squelched in to tell her my impending good news
she looked down in horror at my rank-smelling shoes.
She was speechless with anger, ignoring my pleas
that my brother (that bounder!) had claimed expertise
in making a baby for me to play 'Mum',
and the cost of my innocence: a very numb bum!
Author notes
We still laugh about this little incident to this day ~ and at a landmark birthday of his recently, I took great pleasure in sharing this tale with all his party guests during the speeches! (Ha! pay-back!)
A contest entry
- Childhood (Lets dig deep) by nunchaks.
470 points, ended February 3, 2008, 7 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - MISHAPS by Life is a Beach.
500 points, ended April 20, 2008, 9 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Laugh out Loud by Florida Sunshine.
525 points, ended September 12, 2008, 26 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Rhyme Humor by sorries.
400 points, ended April 23, 23 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 27 of 27
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congrats on the trophies! Well deserved if I say so myself. This has nice rhyme and flow ... the story is funny as all get out. Does he know more about making babies now?
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Wonderful you know what i feel about your humour Excellent
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Not only was this very funny ~ but also very well written ~ I enjoyed every stanza word for word
Thanks so much for entering ~ it was my pleasure to read and review your work,
Best of luck to you,
Florida Sunshine
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haha i very much enjoyed reading this... very well done
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Ha! This is a really funny poem and has a great flow to it!
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hehe
Haha I like this little tale it is always interesting to hear what kids think making babies involves! I'm not sure what I thought before the truth, probably the stork idea! Glad you got your payback, liked the poem and it made me smile
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Absolutely awesome! I loved it! Congratulations on the trophies, they were well deserved!
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Very good
Very nice rhyme. I liked how narrative and understandable it was. It was also very funny. -
Hilarious piece of writing, well penned. Congrats on the trophies.
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Incredible
This is probably one of the funniest poems i have read.
Your rhyming is spectacular and does not read as forced in any way.
I loved this piece.
xoxo
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This is great, i will make sure my brother reads this lil beauty lol
Bravo
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definitely one of the funnier ones I have read on here yet....and loved the opportune moment of your revenge as well
reenie
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lol, funny. a very good well written piece. i like it
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lol! Good one! Very funny and well written. Good luck in the contest
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LOL you are the queen of a good tale, this is hilarious, big brothers are full of awful stories that little sisters always believe... wonderful hun, I hope this takes gold
Karen
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Its a perfect story. Irs funny and has a hint of child-like tones which deliver what i was looking for. Well done and good luck.
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This is funny and a funny story. Older doesn't neccessarily mean wiser.
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This is a wonderful poem... I really liked the way you pictured the scenario so well... I'm glad that you got to pay him back
... as always, purely on the poetry side, the flow was impeccable, the rhyme was perfect and the write was enjoyed immensely
Keep writing
Polly
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wow!
This was just too funny,
lmao.
am still laughing Hehe.
Great Great,
just great.
..Simply Me♥ -
I love it. in particular the long term memory and the ability to 'Pay Back" alsoit fits so well into the nutty background.etc etc.
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Yes! It has to be done.It is a biatch.
A smooth metre and was fun to read.
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i started to read this, and i thought the background to be quite unwisely chosen, but then i got to then end and understood why it was as it was... good poem, i liked it
~Nick
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Great poem. I enjoyed the laugh and I really needed one right now. You have done a great job and I wish you good luck in the contest.
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LOL This is a fantastic poem you have written here - great and steady flow, perfect rhyming you've used as well and a funny little story
Am I glad my sister didn't came up with that idea
Leander
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HAHAHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA Oh my Gohs that is hillarious.
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Oh my! What a cute story
and how embarassing for him.
I'm sure he still cracks
up at it as well.
I love to read about
the lives of others' childhood
experiences.
Thanks for sharing with us.
Keep penning,
~The Inc."
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well thank goodness you didn't get pregnant from that experience ... oh geez, a mom at age four, what would you have done ... roflmbo
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