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My Favorite Poet

You are gone
One too young
None has had such a strong effect
I miss you so much

Jogging through my mind, tips you told me
As you taught me
Smiles we had together
Memories we shared
In denial I wrote more, in your name
Near your bed did I sit
Everyday I wept

Filling my mind with memories
Every lesson you gave me
Rewired my brain, made me smarter
Near your bed did I pray
And Write
Naked were you when I found you
Death near, raped and killed
Exactly was as I saw you in my nightmares were you before me
Zany images ran before me looking at your step father, I know he really did it

Author notes

Crazy-Dan Grand Theft Autumn

this person, Yoni Jasmine Fernandez
taught me initially how to write poetry

she was 14 when she was killed, and I was 11
we spent so much time together

I still miss her to this day, many years later, 9 years later

Her bro whom had the same first name, is title in another poem of mine(just to clear that up for fans of my poetry)

option 16 other

"VANILLA SKYS AND GREEN APPLE MARTINIS"

by crazy-dan

In a list

A contest entry

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    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments

1 - 17 of 17

  • Simply Simple
    February 23, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Oh wow... this is so sad. It really touched me. I can't believe this happened so to someone who sounded so sweet. Life just isn't fair sometimes. All we can do is pick up the pieces, grab some duct tape, and hope for the best. Thank you for the entry and best of luck.


  • DestiniesTwined
    February 16, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is so sad. I'm sorry that happened. Rape is the worst thing any man can do. I'm glad you got something from her. It can help you as well as others.


  • BrokenDawn
    February 12, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Wow this is a very powerful write and I'm so sorry about your friend. Bravo on this peice!
    Goodluck!
    ~dawn♥


  • Wolven Roses
    February 4, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Wow, this is strong. It is heart breaking, and loving at the same time. A little too bittersweet for me, I was looking for the super-cliche happy ending.
    It's a beautiful poem though.


  • O.o
    February 1, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Although I am not sure I really understand...this is nevertheless a fantastic piece of work.

    Thanks for entering


  • InMyFlames
    January 31, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    this is so so sad and a great write well done she has definatly taught you well thanks for entering


  • Xx Secrets xX
    January 31, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Thank you for entering my contest and good luck! I really did like this piece


  • FreeFalling911
    January 30, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    i felt your hurt in this poem,
    i think you could continue it further...
    good luck


    • Crazy-Dan
      January 30, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      actually i cannot continue it further, i used her full name for the poem, looking vertically down you can see her name.


  • Kathryn Bowden
    January 28, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    very heartfelt


  • Perception
    January 28, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    What? *sighs* I still don't see/feel any emotion from this. Your lines just feel so.. Dead.

    I am not going to lie to you, and say ooohhh you're poem is sooo amazing. And I'm not going to take it out on you, because you didn't like my poetry. I am going to be totally real with you. Right here. Or on any of your poetry. (I am going to be brutally honest, and I'm sorry. I am not trying to be mean or anything)

    I didn't like it.
    I didn't feel the emotion. I didn't see her death, and I didn't care - because you didn't MAKE me care.

    I tutor in a 5th grade class, and the teacher says constantly, "Show don't tell."

    I think, you should force yourself to rhyme. Maybe you'll get some emotion into those lines.

    ~I'm sorry


  • Violent Glass
    January 27, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    this is sad
    i hate the things that happen in this world
    i was lucky not to be killed when i was raped
    but i guess some are not as fortunate
    i'm sorry about your friend
    this is a great poem


  • Ktulu Blackwolfe silver member
    January 27, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is a nice tribute write for your lost friend. Sad and deep. Good luck to you.

    **Ktulu Blackwolfe**


  • GypsyEyes
    January 26, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    that's so sad! i love this poem though! very good imagery! thank you for entering my contest and best of luck to you!
    NineTailedFox


  • DogTagz-TheJalapeno
    January 20, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    oh wow.that was sweet. she did a good job teaching you.


  • fallenangel671
    January 19, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    aww. Dan this is soo sad. I'm so sad to hear that this happened to you, I hate hearing stuff like this happening in your life, even if it's already happened,

    beautiful none the less

    keep writing

    ~Ashley~<3


  • GossamerAlice
    January 19, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is a wonderful dedication to your friend! I like how it was poetic yet matter of fact. I'm sorry to hear about her demise. I could feel the deep sorrow and emotion in every stanza. Great job and thank you for this entry!

1 - 17 of 17