into a shell tight clock,
it blinks a minute over
and taps it's tin feet
all over it's mouth,
there's a hidden gift
blended into it's mirrored stove body.
Author notes
The last lines previously:
"there's a present
blended into it's body."
Please, in your comments, keep language simple and clean.
eyes… (inspiration.)
I'm not that good at personification because I don't use it that much, but this was a fun excersize and I hope you like my big attempt!
P.S. I couldn't figure out how to incorporate the "duck egg blue" part, but everything else was used from the prompt.
In a list
A contest entry
- the rusted bucket; a personification contest - with nurse chilly by Cat.
800 points, ended February 17, 2008, 14 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Anything you want by fairytalelovestory.
625 points, ended April 11, 2008, 72 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
... you speak ...
Comments
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this was nice
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i really think you used this exercise well- this is definitely personification
and i think you were able to use the item efficiently.
the word present seems odd to me there.. that is the only stumbling block i have on this piece
thanks so much for entering
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Wowee with effort's relief!
And, I happily revised the last two lines because you didn't get the "present" part just so you know,
Daisy
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i think you did pretty well with this... even though it was one of the harder ones..
well done and many thanks for entering the contest -
I'm sorry but there are only two choices left- the egg timer and the apostle spoons.. you can choose either of those if you'd like. The red farm tractor was chosen yesterday.
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well, it wasn't highlighted dark, so i thought i could use it without looking at everybody's entries also. oops, but ill go in and edit it with using "the egg timer"
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it is highlighted..
but let me go highlight this for you now.. -
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I was thinking the used up ones were the dark shades as the example, but now it's more clear!
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