I lay awake amid a pool of black slime
My bed of liquid cremation
A lull-a-bye of blood trilled echoes
Delicious power and deviant art
A turn to my side
with one eye submerged
The cold permeating
then dying in thy mind
I swim amid a river of ticks
their heads buried deep
In hallways of congealed
crypts and drying beef
They leave me, infected, and punctured with lust
Like spirits of death expulsing me on molten wing
A stroke in slow motion
Less flesh with each breath
Graying and decaying and dying before
The mire lixiviates all left gore in my core
Awake from sleep
My life in tar
I close my eyes and try to think
Of a time distant and far
Was there a day
From my past
That I can use
To start anew?
But as I breathe
And try to reflect
All of my visions
Are of my death.
By: Jaye Eryk
Copyright ©2008
Non-monosyllabic comments welcomed
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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oh wow..this is gross and dark and yet amazing. thank you so much for entering my contest and best of luck!
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"congealed
crypts and drying beef." -
omg, that's so horribly gross! but, you'd make a tasty cheeseburger! 
of all the things, i can really relate to the struggle of trying to dig in the past for something fresh, happy, and...not horrendous! but w/much failure!
*R
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"A lull-a-bye of blood trilled echoes
Delicious power and deviant art." i LOVE those lines they are BRILLIANT great work and thanks for entering.
Keep safe,
Em
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If I were to try and copy and paste here the lines I like the best, I'd have to copy and paste the whole thing. You're ability to wield words so beautifully astounds me. You are truly a gifted writer.
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"My bed of liquid cremation." This particular line gave me a shiver. You know, you should really try reading this while listening to "Moonlight Sonata," it happened to be on while I clicked the link, and it adds to the tone perfectly.
The piece is exquisite in its gore and quiet yet deep-cutting deprecation. It really does inspire introspection, and it makes the mind focus solely on the words within it. This piece is full of talent, very rich and riveting and bold, and deliciously macabre. A lovely piece.
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what a terrible, nasty, ugly, disgusting, brackish, hopeless, utterly negative feeling this is. this had a very detestable aura to it. a very strong smell.
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Depressingly poetic, awesome formatting as always! =)
I love that you take time to format your poems in a way that reflect the mood of the poem.
"A lull-a-bye of blood trilled echoes"
Probably my favorite line...I love the idea of an echo singing in the crazed mind.
"Like spirits of death expulsing me on molten wing."
Strong visuals...and spirits of death. Just, wow.
And the death theme--you make death sound so alluring, and I'm terrified of it...=)
Jessica
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The beginning almost sounds as if you are dreaming, only to awake toward the end to find that life is much like the dream. Trying to find something to hang onto, yet finding nothing but visions of death. Who's to say which is which though...life could possibly be the dream and our nightmares our lives...perhaps an inter-weaving of both.
The descriptions in this are disgusting vivid..
I swim amid a river of ticks
their heads buried deep
In hallways of congealed
crypts and drying beef
unfortunately though...it is what it is. I am curious about the word 'lixiviates', you stumped me with this one, had to find it, and it was not easy to find...and I am still not sure I am understanding the meaning.
I liked the analogy of life in tar...I feel as if sometimes that is exactly how it feels, as always, you paint a brutally honest place no one likes to imagine, let alone admit that it might exist.
~B.
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