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Striking






Reality bites
  with karma's strike,

exposing concaved perceptions
        beneath illusions

          faded;


cold and full
   justice is served,

      a bitterrsweet bitch.








Author notes

Your prompt is: Insidious Attributes

In a list

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments

1 - 17 of 17

  • LadyDementia gold member
    April 6, 2008

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    Congrats on the gold!!

    You have written a wonderful piece, I especially like the ending. Superbly done, congrats on the gold.


  • leander Moderators member
    February 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Ooh, powerful
    and I couldn't help of picturing you smashing your purse against one's head


  • HeavenonEarth
    February 1, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Oh now this one Bel...
    I'm loving this one. Oh how true this one is. I hope you don't mind if I bookmark. I might just print this one out and hang in my bedroom.
    How true it is...
    Definitely deserving of the Gold!
    Much Love and Many Blessings~
    ~Joy


  • Amunet Wolfbane Moderators member
    January 27, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I think I read this one before...anyway I freakin love it! The ending line really slaps the face, hard! Beauifully done. I do love it when a short piece makes an impact that makes you go !


  • Moons Lunar Angel
    January 23, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Sounds like me Truly deserved gold!!! Love you mum


  • Sandra R Reynolds gold member
    January 22, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Good congratulation on gold


  • Matt Holck
    January 19, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    coffee and chocolate
    cigarettes


  • Ahti
    January 19, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Well said.
    Powerful, as well.
    Well done.


    -Saint


  • suseann
    January 19, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Obviously gold! Great descriptions.You've crafted words from a feeling with primo style here.

  • Amunet Wolfbane Moderators member
    January 18, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    A hart hitter and very well done. I like where the prompt took you and this one...very impressive to say the least


  • Heavenly Angel silver member
    January 18, 2008
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    Awesomely done, Bel
    Wishing you the best of luck in this contest


  • Swan song gold member
    January 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Well I am speechless! this is good and intense stuff.
    I loved it! Tha all I can say. Stutter stutter!


  • mysticstorm gold member
    January 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Nice take on the prompt...reality does bite, yet I often wonder whos reality we live.
    Exceelnt job and I love the ending...made me smile...bittersweet it is.
    Best to you!


  • RedwingSpirit silver member
    January 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Yep reality bites. I like your write. I wish you the best of look in the contest. Redwing Spirit


  • Rose Dark Thorn silver member
    January 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Love you! Awesomeness. I wish I could write short poems brilliantly. Alas, I can't, because I suck at them. Aha.


  • raggyann
    January 18, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    this was great
    i loved it


  • arafura gold member
    January 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Relity does bite hard and it can certainly be a bitch! Very deep and thoughtful work, with much conveyed in a few short lines. Well done and good luck in the contest!

1 - 17 of 17