You say I ruined your life the day I was born
Well hello mother dear I didn't ask for that, I'm not to blame
You chose to lay down with him that night
So don't accuse me of being the source of your shame
Then to make matters a million times worse
You didn't tell me the name of this man
It came from others who could tell me the truth
Still you denied me, trying to keep worms in a can
Even when I met my wonderful dad and had tests done with DNA
The proof is there, all on paper, did you open up and to me be honest
No mother dear you kept up the sordid pretence, your fantasy
I've tried to understand, show compassion, I really have done my best
Now the lovely man I now know was my dad
Has passed on and I feel alone and miss him deep inside
Who can I share with this heavy grief that I feel?
Not you is it? I have no trust that will let me confide
What were your reasons for treating me like this?
Is it your shame for sleeping with a man of skin dark
Or the fact your daughter is shamefully half cast?
I am used to it mother I know I don't meet your mark
I am not perfect, I didn't stand a chance to be
All my life rejected, put down and turned away by you
Now I am not interested I don't want to know
You want a relationship, and I don't know what to do
Can I let the pain drop? Can I simply forgive the past?
And if I do will anything change to make you care?
I honestly don't know mum that is the sad truth
The future is not mine to see, so it is if I can take the dare
Maybe we could if you did only one thing
Tell me the truth about who the hell I am
Is honesty too much to ask of you even now?
Mum give me a reason why I should give a damn
Silver trophy winner
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