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After Tuesdays Gone

Progression towards destiny
another self-provoked fate;
extractions made from deciphering
the elongated insertions
stretched by the black veins
in voltaic packets
of desire

The temperature that merits heat
cannot be dissuaded by distance
nor suffered for a fool
by imaginations playful longing,
cradling awe within craving skin
that crawls while waiting
to share its’ radiating
warmth

Subliminal intentions lose their veil
and subtle implications
tell their tale

random deviations implore relief;
lust is such an obedient slave
to so many cruel masters-
imagination, hope, fantasy

yet beyond dual realities
lays in wait a finality…


you.

Author notes

The messages sent through the miles of computer cable..

The longing for someone who is many miles away...

The view of the future from the minds eye...

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

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    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments

1 - 14 of 14

  • Blooming Poet
    March 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is beautiful and may I take the oppurtunitny now to say thank you for making my contest a sucess by making use of unlimited entries, I love your poetry and honored to read them in my contest.

  • PageTurner
    February 17, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    Your Poem's passion and profundity speaks volumes!
    I especially liked these lines...


    "Subliminal intentions lose their veil
    and subtle implications
    tell their tale"


    A Subliminal Stimulus, Scribe!
    Congrats on the SILVER!

    ~ Nicky♥


  • Exit-Stage-Right
    January 19, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I'd originally clicked on this because I wanted to see if the noun "wind" appeared in it. That sounds odd, but I couldn't help thinking Lynyrd Skynyrd: "Tuesday's Gone, with the wind..." So, of course, you did take off on a wholly different tangent, which is good. I had a sort of hard time at first... your avatar is very unique, but at the same time annoying when you're trying to read. The mood of your poem is much more somber and intellectual than the death metal rocker thrashing about. It's too bad the reader can't suppress it if needs be. Anyway, once I started reading my wife asked me a question, so I tabbed-out to a new web page and flash09.ocx crashed Internet Explorer, so that's the only reason you didn't get a reply earlier when I clicked. I had started to go into my usual laundry list of apostrophes and misspellings and stuff, but then I remembered you didn't care much for that sort of thing.

    So, this is an interesting piece... very remote metaphor, but, I guess I find the whole thing kind of preachy in a textbook sort of way:

    The temperature that merits heat
    cannot be dissuaded by distance
    nor suffered for a fool

    --almost sounds like something out of a physics book.

    Subliminal intentions lose their veil
    and subtle implications
    tell their tale

    --sounds very much like a statement of fact

    I like this piece as a cold, emotionless abstract. Even when it appears that you try to induce warmth, "black veins" have already predisposed me to thinking cold and dark.

    . Rewarded 8


  • February Moon gold member
    January 19, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Very well done.
    Chelsea


  • PrabhuDayal Khattar gold member
    January 19, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    yet beyond dual realities
    lays in wait a finality…

    you.


    this write speaks in volumes..ah..this is very beautifulmy friend..well done...

  • PerfectImperfection
    January 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    A very well expressed piece of thought. The way you convey the emotion, leaves its mark - beautifully.

    "subliminal intentions lose their veil
    and subtle implications
    tell their tale"

    Such a vivid and intriguing piece. You have quite a way with words, and this write is certainly no exception. Amazing, as always. Thank you so much for your entry & best wishes to you in the contest!


  • Devils Reject
    January 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is awesome You did an excellent job on this piece.


  • plainoljoe
    January 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    certainly it is the title of one of my favorite tunes that drew me here. So glad it did. I'm not easily impressed but you have put into words what many can never explain or attempt to understand.

    Joe

    . Rewarded 4


  • cherche -d -ame
    January 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    quite a vocabulary you must have and it did this write justice. I understand that of which you write , but must admit that it is not through personal experience...unless of course it would be re some of my relatives and loved ones that live thousands of miles away.
    But herein it is the distance of lovers separated, and the imagination being left free to dream and plan about "one of these days maybe....and then...and then , etc"
    Whomever this is to, I wish you both the very best,
    reenie

  • ears2hearyou gold member
    January 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    BRAVO! BRAVO! BRAVO!

    oh my..i really liked that imagery..subliinal intentions lose their veil and subtle implications
    tell their tale...oh that is so lovely and wicked,
    and cleverly done! Applaud-Applaud-Applaud.
    Just loved that! well well done!
    ears2hearyou
    Kathleen : )) so smartly written, really
    captured it all so well!

    . Rewarded 6


  • georgie
    January 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    brilliant and much more understandable with the comments... thanks for the link i really did love this piece and now that i understand it fully i love it even more,
    hugs,
    georgie,
    xxx
1 - 14 of 14