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Rachel

Missing image

 

I remember it vividly
We sat in the dark on the cold steps outside
As the celebrations went on noisily inside
She looked at me earnestly and said:
‘If anything ever happens to Stu
I would only want to be with you’

I have never wished harm to anyone before
I’m ashamed to admit... I did that night

She told him eventually
And before they left he took me aside
Told me how much he loved her, his new bride
So it would unlikely ever be
I squeezed his arm and said take care of her
And if they ever needed me, I would be there

I wished them well in their far away new life
And I even meant it… then I kissed her goodbye

 

 

 

Author notes

What can I say? Rach.. a dear friend, a beautiful woman. This moment happened a few months before they married...

RACH IS BACK HOME.... YAYYYY
(and umm without Stu)

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Comments

1 - 45 of 45

  • Rovingone gold member
    June 15

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    So full of feeling. Too bad for him he couldn't keep it going, she is so lovely. And, she has a very stunningly beautiful friend, I must say.

  • solo wisp
    June 10

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    aww ... ohh? hmmm. eee ... yes. Wonder what happened to Stu ...

    This reads like a story ... which I like, especially in poetic form. But, this story is true!

    Wow ... lotsa emotion ...


  • xCandieKissesx
    May 31

    Edit | Reply
    Aww! What a sweet piece of art! I bet she would have been pleased to hear this! Emotion was running through my body while reading this, I thought I was gonna cry! Amazing job Cuz!

  • In Too Deep1 gold member
    May 30

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    Beautiful! I loved the satirical flow of emotion here. The candid sentiment highlighted the sincerity and fabric of close friends. A most enjoyable read.


  • Mat Larkin
    May 28

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    How perfect...

    grand story...and the author notes made me laugh for your good fortune. I hope nothing bad happened to him...

    Well, not too bad...



    Mat

  • chiefmac
    May 28

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    What a lovely sentiment, a dear friend is something that is never repleaced. Nice rhyme and flow to move the content. Ideas tell the reader consistent logic.


  • Leila
    May 27

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    Aww i love this!! SO sad But yay for her being back home!!
    Andd the pic is well cute, you look gorgeous in it!! =]
    Great work sis xxx


  • unmasked synergy
    May 15

    Edit | Reply
    oh I love your voice in this!
    its the soft pens with the powerful messages that often get to me, and you delivered, poignant and meaningful.
    -a thousand sighs-

    un.


  • Allan Emery silver member
    March 4

    Edit | Reply
    My my my. You sure like the torturous drama, don't you? Hahaha. This has never happened to me. I know when to be a jerk and make things easier for everyone.


    • kiwigirljacks gold member
      March 4
      Edit | Reply
      Hey!! I dont' go looking for it ya know!!

      It just seems to find me.. and I never even hit on her lol.. it was her coming to me ya know... it was kinda outta the blue! But yeah, would've gone there! pahahahah

      • Allan Emery silver member
        March 4
        Edit | Reply
        Oh, yes you do! You are constantly on the lookout!

        • kiwigirljacks gold member
          March 4

          Edit | Reply
          Pfffttt... please!! Yea.. I so love people telling me they'd want to be with me 'if only...'

  • imahealer
    March 3

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    What a vivid poem of a poignant love loss. You know, it seems when we read each other's works it brings back uncomfortable memories of a similar event. This poem did that for me. Your use of language, so haunting. What a talent you have to be able to evoke this kind of forgotten memory. I'll tell you. When I had my sister's third wedding, at the very end, her husband came over and whispered in my ear, "It is you I really love, but you're already married. This is the only way I could stay close to you." I almost puked!
    You are quite the writer. Mind if I add you to my fav's?

    Shana


    • kiwigirljacks gold member
      March 3
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you so much!!

      Oh no!! God... what a moment to say that!!! Seeesshhh!
      Yay, yes please, and I"ll add you to my favs!
  • Papagallo
    February 24

    Edit | Reply

    Oh my gosh

    This is so beautiful I am at a loss for words. To have that said to you. I can only understand you saying "I wish, I wish." This really seems like a love loss. I have been told something similar and it does give one an unexplained feeling. A beautiful poem of a lost love, perhaps?


    • kiwigirljacks gold member
      February 24
      Edit | Reply
      Yes.. a poem of what could have been.. if things were different! Hmmm I seem to have a couple of poems about lost love don't I?

      Thank you so much for the nice comment..

  • Valley Girl Greeters member
    February 19

    Edit | Reply
    This is such an emotional poem. I like your line "I have never wished harm to anyone before I’m ashamed to admit... I did that night", you can really sense your strong feelings for your friend. are you still close today? and did she ever know how you felt?

    • kiwigirljacks gold member
      February 19
      Edit | Reply
      Yes we are still close... the 3 of us in fact! And they will be coming home soon. Yay! She knew.... we were both honest with each other...
      Thanks hun

  • aboomer silver member
    February 13

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    wow, full of honest emotion, well stated, great wording and a great story. Must have been so hard, but I've always heard, you never really love someone unless you can say...I love you enough to want to see you happy, even if it's with someone else. Anyways, this was a great write!


  • Yemassee silver member
    February 7

    Edit | Reply
    It's honest, that's a thing most poems here aren't (in my opinion.)

    As you know, love comes in many forms and friendship, though different, can be as strong as the other kinds.


    • kiwigirljacks gold member
      February 7
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks!! All my poems are honest, I try to be.. and all pretty much all about my life.. sigh!

      THanks for commenting!!
  • nothinghere silver member
    February 4

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    What a beautiful sentiment... not all love is between a man and a woman, it comes in every form... just gorgeous

    Karen


  • mds5158
    February 3

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    Oh, wow. This shows so much strength of character. It's never easy letting go of someone we care about.


  • x.Angel.x silver member
    February 1
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    this is sad kinda
    i love you auntie hugggggggggs you tight


  • stompsalot
    January 25
    Edit | Reply
    wow! intense heartfelt emotion seeps in this write. powerfully penned.
    blessings and Istomps


    • kiwigirljacks gold member
      January 25
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you so much! I'm all about raw emotion... my writing is basic in form, but I hope heartfelt!

      Thanks again
  • almostgone
    January 22

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    Very enjoyable read. You are a really good friend to want to be there to look out for her. It's also a very sweet message. If only everyone could be as caring and as forthright a friend as you are.


  • poppa silver member
    January 22

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    Have you shown her this poem........sure she would love it.... very heartwarming and shows your caring nature......shes a lucky friend


    • kiwigirljacks gold member
      January 22
      Edit | Reply
      No I haven't shown her... but this was many years ago and we're still friends, all 3 of us.

      Hmmm... this was during my.. er, experimental stage, shall we say lol

  • LadyDementia gold member
    January 22

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    Aww hunni such a sad longing piece. Hard thing to do sometimes, letting go. Beautifully put hunni, bravo


  • Mystal LaRose
    January 21

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    i agree with Ravensdark a bitter sweet mixture of love, longing, and letting go this reminds me of someone...
    Really good this poem is one i really like better than any other poem


  • pappacass
    January 20
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    i don't know if i could be that sweet

    another enjoyable read


  • Ravensdark
    January 19

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    Great write. Tis a bitter sweet mixture of love, longing, letting go, honesty and friendship. Painful in a not so painful way. Excellent poem.

  • Destined4Destruction
    January 19
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    A Great Reflection......

  • PrInCeSsOfRoCk
    January 19

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    Fab

    awesome write hun! really loved it and yea wiked good as usual hehe

    mwah xxx


  • stig
    January 18
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    amazing it was like a story in a poem it was awesome and well written and flowed wonderfully .x.

  • Burtan
    January 17

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    Honest and real. You can tell someone is a good hearted person when they take the time out to acknowledge and question the negative thought that they have had about someone else. Not many people do this.
    Someone once told me that that the definition of love is: The fear of hurting the other person’s feelings more than the fear hurting your own.


  • CherryOnTop
    January 16
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    This is such a beautiful poem you have written.And sounds like you almost had your mate right here.

  • SoulWhispher
    January 16

    Edit | Reply

    Well Done

    A well written walk through memories that flows so well with great emotions, good job, your muse is coming back, John

1 - 45 of 45