These days are for the daises
I speak for the tress and we’re hungry
I’ll do whatever it takes to please you
These steel reserves are running dry and I don’t remember if I love you
I’ll have a whisky sour on the rocks of my teeth
The tooth fairy is blind and her Seeing Eye dog has been put to pasture
A dollar fifty for two, I hope so much that, that will do
I remember when the bordello painted the specials on the head boards
Seven more lines to tell you how I feel, and I think I’m coming off all wrong
Beauty in a crack house epiphany
That’s what reminds me of you
There I go again comparing you such travesty
Cigarettes put you out of my mind
Like Dylan’s Mr. Jones I’m such a fool
Give me back my throat and ill sing you a sonnet full of mistakes
Author notes
Bryant36 like there was any doubt just read the bitch lol. Thanks to Alan Clark, Bob Dylan, and the Beatels Yer Blues
A contest entry
- 15 lines or less by whiterabbit..
350 points, ended January 30, 2008, 16 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - PRE-WRITES GALLORE ~!~!~! by Naridill.
800 points, ended January 31, 2008, 138 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Part I of Friday's 5 Part Series by Exodus.
525 points, ended February 27, 2008, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Unrequited by Chelsea Void.
525 points, ended May 31, 2008, 10 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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interesting. this is so fully of stuff! tis pretty funky.
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so many allusions, so much imagery, it's fantastic!
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congrats on the trophy....i enjoyed it
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I haven't read a poem like this in a loooooong time and it was absolutely wonderful. The second stanza smacked me in the face while the fourth line of the first was like a punch in the gut. My only suggestion to you is punctuation
Thank you -
great poem
keep up the good work
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Beautiful~! Short simple and to the point - love this - the phrasing is intimidating and simple awesome.
Thanks for entering,
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fuck this is even better than the last one i read. i feel like i'm in the same setting as the previous. i get the same feelings and emotions but this time they're way more intense. for being only 17 you have a very unique and mature style and i'm very impressed, i can tell you're a few years ahead of others it seems and i appreciate and connect well with people of this nature. keep on keepin' on.
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lovethis, lovethis.
♥
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There was no doubt this was you lol.
I really love this. I like how your style is so different from other writers that it's easy to tell that it's you. I love the references.
I really love the ending, actually I love the whole thing. There's just something about it.
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