Suicide Pains

        As you consider suicide as the solution for the hate inside of you. The kind of hate that can start a war minutes or, flip a switch and kill thousands in seconds. The hate you've been bottling up like the poison you have for the day you choose to use it. The hate, black as the mind of BTK with murderous intent gleaming on his happy face as he stalks his victim.

Keeping the hate away from your family, your friends. Never letting your undying emotions show! All you can remember is that one tearful day, with grief as heavy as a hurricane raining tears.

That  one day that you went to the funeral for that broken man, that you thought you knew so well. The broken man, that we all tried to fix, but couldn't, for his impurities are not of the mind, but of the heart.That light pole man who drove away the darkness from your mind, your heart, your dreams. The light-hearted man that you lost to the dreadful misery that hung over his head like a rainy day. The misery that would not release it's grip oh his seemingly care-free emotions for nothing less than death.

        All you can remember is the screams of that one lady, muffled by the grief that holds her tight to this day. Muffled to the point where you can't hear her scream  his name in distress, calling him towards her in vain. The screams from that one lady filled with pure agony, filled with despair as she reaches out for her little boy. Trying to hold onto him one last time! Never letting him go!

        But you see he is gone now . . . Gone from this world to the world of his dreams filled with milk and honey. He is gone now. No longer an "is" but now a "was". No longer a "hello" but a "goodbye". No longer making memories but re-living them.

All because of the bullet in that gun . . . As it shot upwards into Heaven, taking him with it. Taking him from his father's garage to his Father's Kingdom in the sky.

See he is gone now. But the misery that he has bestowed upon the ones he loved will live on forever in the form of . . . Suicide Pains.