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Tune of Rapture

Eyes closed against the sound,
Heart beat breaking rhythm,
Feet tapping, on the ground,
My hands go into spasm.
Timing my emotions lyrically
Surrender myself happily
To the pagan tunes that play
Across my ears, my heart has it’s say
Music with the power to uplift
Or to bash it’s ever so fragile gift
Melodramatic tune
It’s all over much to soon.

Author notes

Option #1 (prompt was the picture)
Name Melissa Burns

Like, hate it - it was just there

A contest entry

:) Contest entry

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 11 of 11
  • limechic
    August 24, 2008

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    I like it...sometimes music just captures us in a way that makes us dance inside and out

    Great write, good luck in the contest!


  • LiMarie silver member
    April 2, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Gorgeous, this is why one writes music right? To inspire feeling.. to reflect emotion. These lines slay me "Feet tapping, on the ground,
    My hands go into spasm.
    Timing my emotions lyrically" Such a great way of expressing that joyous abondon when a tune really grabs you..and perfectly apt for the picture. Beautiful read.


  • DarkestAngel68
    March 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    This is really good

    I like this poem. It is well worded and, it gives a very good idea of the feelings behind the one who it is about.Awesome work.


  • Pursed Poker Lips
    February 21, 2008

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    Hey

    I was jiggling my foot and bobbing my head, I can taste the rhyhtm...I spelt that wrong. Whatev. I loved it, its A-MAZING! I dig.
    -BON*BON


  • MJ Donnelly gold member
    February 20, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    "Across my ears, my heart has it’s say
    Music with the power to uplift
    Or to bash it’s ever so fragile gift"


    Loved this! The diction and flow is masterful! Ya, I can see why this won silver, although it could have easily won gold as well.


    Sincerely,
    mj


  • Zixaphir
    February 14, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I like the last line, because it really does feel like it's over much too soon. Also, I went to check the picture prompt for this, and it does suit it exceptionally well. Good write!

    The only real thing that struck me as "off" was the switch from ABAB to AABB. Maybe it just caught me off guard, but it was interesting anyways. ^^


  • Metaphorist
    February 4, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Great description of the picture. And congrats on the trophy. Favorite line: "Timing my emotions lyrically". What a perfect way to describe music's influence on the heart.


  • Sagerider
    January 18, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    I like it alot

    It leaves a strong visual image.


  • joelegy
    January 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Timing my emotions lyrically
    Surrender myself happily
    To the pagan tunes that play
    Across my ears, my heart has it’s say

    I like these lines ^^

    and the last 2 the best

    REally nice..


  • BeautifullyBroken42
    January 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    this is my favorite. i love that picture and haven't wrote about it yet but i will and i think it will be somewhat like this. i mean THIS IS AWESOME!

  • juno0404
    January 16, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    "Eyes closed against the sound,
    Heart beat breaking rhythm,
    Feet tapping, on the ground,
    My hands go into spasm.
    Timing my emotions lyrically"

    I love your take on the prompt,nice flow.
    Best of luck in the contest.

1 - 11 of 11