tipping over, peel
the film from your hands
feel the need to make words
feel the passion of love swell
and finally become human
Whatcha think?
Comments
1 - 13 of 13
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Hood Wink!
This reminds me of what I might find my little brother writing, but it has a twist that says this is by Kevin
Great to read, and a little thought provoking
♥
Stay safe
~Manda
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i love the way you show the love through the words well done
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A+ poetry right here
"feel the passion of love swell
and finally become human "
I love that part. Captures such a picture for the mind to collect.
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wow, mass produced people, pored from a kiln of pre-mordial soup,
shrink wrapped, and able to free themselves from the machine. This paints quite a mechanically penciled picture in just a few words, perhaps we may see a full production of the above said.~~~Artis
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words ,passion and humanity ...this is poetry..you said it again
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I liked it. Easy words, for some of us slow peoples
And, simply put. Nice job. :]
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this is brill.
you made simple words highly deep and meanigful
kinda reminds me of my english teacher
he says poetry is what makes us human, and i agree
keep it up
stephanie
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The first line made me think of someone slipping on a bananna peel and that kind of ruined my seriousness and attention to read the poem in depth good write
Mylee -
10
very relatable. this is how i imagine my husband feels.
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walking through all obstacles, peeling away the unneeded, becoming the words that softly flow, and finally swelling with the passion that's makes us all human...sighs...i really enjoyed, niaish my friend for sharing your words with me
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Yup!
Agreed... For me to know this... Driven I will have the need to be open to know a new freedom... and through my writing I am helped along a little more to let go... To embrace the joy of being human...
Great and profound pronunciation of the truth my friend...
Well written...
God bless you and maintain you in your freedom...
I loved it!
~ James ~
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This is a lovely poem. The title uses alliteration very well and I like the artificial feel to it because it comes in contrast with the very human, emotional message of the poem, emphasizing it. The brevity of this makes it sound very powerful. I'm a little unsure about the third line, though, as "feel" is repeated twice in only five lines and in the third one I don't think it's that necessary. Otherwise, I really like this. Especially "peel the film from your hands".
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this is good short to the point has a lot of meaning amazing
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