Hiding –
Ducking down behind the parapet,
I received a telegram –
And boy, did it lead to my demise.
With a rush of blood to the head,
I opened it up,
And ‘lo and behold,
I found out that I was a father!
But, the blood was not the only thing rushing to my head;
From the German trench,
I was heard in my glee by a Bosch!
Silently – almost invisibly, he took aim.
Rushing through the sickly air,
Was a polished silver bullet,
Shot by the German,
Who was probably laughing with glee.
No sooner that my fatherhood had been declared,
I was facing Saint Peter,
And he laughingly said to me;
“Life’s Lesson: Use a condom.”
Author notes
Distracted by his wife, in the middle of World War I
François Faber, Luxembourgean Tour de France winner, died in a trench on the western front of World War I. He received a telegram saying his wife had given birth to a daughter. He cheered, giving away his position, and was shot by a German sniper (1915).
A contest entry
- CONTEST: Memories of a funny death. by Barry Hodges.
400 points, ended February 11, 2008, 10 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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This poem is humorous. You did a wonderful job with this. *smiles* God bless you always in everything you do and good luck in the contest.
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Very amusing. I fell asleep after line 2.
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Awww, poor you! I suggest some caffeine!
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Many of my brother vampires feasted well on the battlefields!
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Hilarious piece of writing, well done
Best of luck in the competition and welcome to AP.
- Jojo x sinnocence -
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Thanks alot!
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this made me chuckle.
i like it!
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A FINE DEATH!
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