Author notes
Photo taken by me of a rose from my rose garden
A contest entry
- HAIGA by Sonja.
2800 points, ended January 27, 2008, 7 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - How much can you say in just a few lines? by reckless abandon.
700 points, ended June 21, 35 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 17 of 17
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Very creative with the photo (which is also very nice) I liked reading this one. it really sums up a lot in just a few lines, like a longer poem without anything unnecessary. great job and thanks for entering!
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Very nice touch with the flower, it was very personal.
However you have not completed the full criteria for the competition. I therefore cannot consider this in a trophy position.
Thank you for entering. -
Beautiful picture and lovely haiku! I can almost smell the wonderful fragrance of the rose...one of my favorite flowers. Great job!
Carolyn
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Congratulations on winning the bronze, Dawn!
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Nice picture. My remark would be only about its "severed" petals edges.
Scores:
Picture quality: 9.8
Text layout: 10
Haiku per se: 10
Total scores: 29,8 of 30
Nice done!
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Beautiful picture and haiku!Loved the transition between beaiuty and hurt Best of luck in the contest
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Thank you
I appreciate your kind comments and applause, thank you very much.
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wot a butiful rose i can almost smell its scent ... loves the lil verse it all go so well togefer .. good luck in the contest ... ~ cheeky ~ x
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Thank you!
I very much appreciate your kind comments and applause, cheeky! Thank you very much!
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Beautiful picture, the poem shows up well also.
My only problem is that fragile and delicate mean essentially the same thing. How about using another quality of rose petals, such as "fragrant", or perhaps dropping one of the adjectives?
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Thank you!
I very much appreciate your assistance, I realized you were right, I swear I was thinking fragrant but wrote fragile! You are right, two adjectives meaning the same thing! Thank you so much for bringing it to my attention. It amazes me how I can miss these things after seeing them over and over. Thank you for your help and your kind applause.
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hmmm i like this one aunt reminds me of a beautiful wicked witch!
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Thank you niece
Isn't she a beauty? This bush has cut me more than I have cut it! So in some ways she is a beautiful wicked witch! Thank you so much for your kind comments and applause.
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I think I have to learn more about haiku and haiga (news to me!). The photo is beautiful, and the thoughts you present make it a pleasure to dwell on your page. Good luck!
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Thank you!
I very much appreciate your kind comments and applause, I have much info about haiku should you ever need it. Thank you for your kind review.
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Lovely indeed, you make it seem so easy, your words flow so simple, but create that needed thought processes to hold the visual effect instead of being just discriptive. I need to stop reading all of the stuff out there on Haikus, I am getting so confused between English style vs original, to make sure that it gives a meaning not just words with 5,7,5 style, which so many of us thought was steadfast. Also, that they always had to be of nature, but don't, can have even less count than 5,7,5. All the do's and don't can make a muse run and hide, but alas, I can read one of yours and it makes me realize I am putting way to much into it, and to just make it natural, not force. Sorry to have rambled, but your work can always bring back what you've taught me, thanks for the recheck
Jen
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Smile..
You finally got it! Read, read, read. Less than 5-7-5, ONLY 5-7-5! Not true, you feel a haiku moment Jen! Yes, I put too much thought into it at first too, we all do until we get it! Then after reading all that info find out it all contradicts itself! You know the aha moment, you know it is not a steadfast rule that it be 5-7-5. Please enter one of NoWayJo or Azure85's haiku workshops sometime, they have taught me much. But I think you've got the general premise as of haiku down right now! Get haikuing girl! They will just come, no need to force them. Congratulations I know I was happy to know when I had it! Yeah!
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