this glossy hair will grow
past my dying
as will these perfect nails,
inches of vanity to measure
the loss
will they still be beautiful
as my context composts?
is it possible to dance
without feet
and, if it hurts more,
are you alive
or just more aware of death?
these literal metaphors
and ugly little questions
press through me
in my daily crucifixion-
awareness spreads to extremities
while the centre forgets
here was a hand
or the shadow of a hand,
they looked quite similar
caught between firelight
and wall
but the contrast was found
in touch, where the shadow held
no warmth
so it is not strange
that a funeral costs more
than a birth,
just the vanity of flesh
trying to heat old clay.
Author notes
Just a poem - I'm fine - really. Well, mostly
In a list
A contest entry
- I Am Lazy by alexandrathegreat.
1300 points, ended January 25, 7 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think (Critical Honesty Appreciated)
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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The first stanza is so powerful I contemplate reading the rest, because I want to hold these words in my head for eternity just as they are. This is so much more in depth then I expected to get in this contest. Though I should've known what to expect from you. Thank you for entering always a pleasure.
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you're definitely alive baby... definitely.
Outstanding.
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I am always impressed by references to shadow in poetry,
especially here in this poem, here in these lines –
“here was a hand
or the shadow of a hand,
they looked quite similar
caught between firelight
and wall”
what grips me most here is an allusion (intended or unintended) to an allegory – the one of Plato’s Cave. Where reality is masked and diffused to images which dance upon the wall where immobile prisoners think the shadows are reality. To me, this poem of yours seems to say that we may acquire concepts by our perceptual experience of physical objects but we would be mistaken if we thought that the concepts that we grasp were on the same level as the things we perceive.
I think, when placed in juxtaposition to Jung’s concept of shadow with the dancing shadows on the cave wall, the image takes on new meaning…who we are is more than light and shade, it is an essence beyond describing, full and present to an awakening moment of individuality. Your ability to see the truth of your being is evident here, you are, indeed, a marvelous woman.
blessings and best wishes,
~r.
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Interesting questions and a wonderfully pensive way of looking at the conclusion
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A well written write which seeks to undress how we dress death ,the imagery and emotion have clarity, the concerns are compounded by effective alliteration and a balance of questions and answers.
I read recently that crematoriams are seeking to reduce heating costs and global warming by utilizing the heat produced from cremating the dead to warm the living attending their loved one's service, they dressed this idea up by saying it was a beautiful way to be warmed one more time via one's loved one.
Your write, entitled context, bought this to mind, for everything is seen in one context or another. A thought provoking write.
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this has quite intresting metaphors to it, and a philosophy that goes fathoms beyond its intended meaning, to transend the self. This could be compared to a society, where vanity and things become more important than soul. This is a profound write.
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