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Seasons speak

Did spring usher in?
Cuckoo started singing sweet
forgetting dryness
+++++++++++++++++++
Did autumn take leave?
The tender leaves wet in shoots
while snow bids farewell
++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Did  winter chills gone?
my love needs no warmth now
she defines summer!!!!
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Author notes

seasons smile in sweet

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

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Comments

1 - 6 of 6

  • Tamera
    January 28, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I like what you did with this, the three seasons, and taking it from defining nature to a relationship so suddenly. Very nice.


    • Purush
      January 28, 2008
      Edit | Reply

      Thank you

      Thank you for your cordial message


  • myron silver member
    January 23, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    what is a 'true' haiku?

    Hi, I hope you don’t mind my comments.

    Ron has asked me to try to find some ‘true’ haiku in this contest. I’m looking for haiku which show:
    1) a juxtaposition between two sense images,
    2) written with one break in the grammatical flow and
    3) using clear, unpoetic language.

    In haiku I’m looking to see and hear what the poet sees and hears around them. Most of the entries I’m reading are 17 syllable poems containing thoughts and opinions about nature, often containing statements rather than images. I’m not sure that’s enough to constitute a ‘true haiku’.

    Your samples here are perhaps too poetic for haiku. For example, take this line:
    "The tender leaves start smiling"

    It is wonderful poetry, but unfortunately it is not the plain language generally used for haiku as it uses personification.


    Yours in haiku,
    Myron.



  • maggiejamespoet silver member
    January 14, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Beautiful haiku chain--very original and creative! Good luck in the contest!

    • Purush
      January 14, 2008
      Edit | Reply

      THANK YOU

      THANK YOU for your kind words
      purush


      • Lyndon gold member
        January 24, 2008
        Edit | Reply

        I wish to judge soon.

        No one, as yet, is worthy of a trophy. Do read the notes again. Please take heed of my chief judge, Myron.
        You still have time to make changes. Purush, you will see similar remarks on other people's work here. Respond quickly with the raw material you have.

1 - 6 of 6