Dearest close friends,
I’m writing this to tell you,
All of what happened,
And all of the truth.
You see, this problem,
The one that I had,
I couldn’t see the good,
But only the bad.
It all got really hard.
I couldn’t take it anymore.
So I ended my life,
Right here on this floor.
There are a few people,
I’d like to say goodbye to.
Some I didn’t want to leave,
Reaper, especially you.
If my own moments,
I hadn’t have taken,
I’d say I love you,
And I wouldn’t be mistaken.
I would tell you it all.
How much I’ve always cared.
I’d ask you to remember,
Every moment that we shared.
Then I would say good bye to Emily.
My best dork in the world.
No matter what face I wore,
My real feelings you’d unfurl.
Andrew, sorry you’re last.
That doesn’t mean a thing.
You’re still my best friend,
I’ll miss you being a proud Greek.
As I write, I begin to cry.
I think, maybe just one more day.
So I fold up this paper,
And I hide it away.
Author notes
Option Number Eight
I wrote a suicide note, way back when I was depressed. It was kinda like this one, different people and it wasn't a poem. It ended the same though. I realized after saying good bye that life might be worth living so I just hid it somewhere found it later and then threw it away.
Don't worry Emily I'm not saying goodbye anytime soon!!
ps-comment please!!
Jan 14 2008
Wow! Thanks so much everyone for your comments. and thank you judges for the gold!!!!!
A contest entry
- 1 big winner! by DogTagz-TheJalapeno.
304 points, ended January 13, 2008, 15 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
For A Contest.
Comments
1 - 29 of 29
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WOW!
This one wiped the smile off my face dead(excuse the pun!) fast. What a change of mood, but quite understandable. You explaned so well the depth of dispare you must have been feeling at the time, I'm so pleased you decided to give it another day.
Again, good diction, nice flow. I am looking forward to reading the rest of your poems.
EddiePS. you deserved to win, well done.
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Wow.
I love this!
I can relate to it well,
I mean..
how life can get so hard at times..
but that I would at least cherish what I have,
to wait one more day to the people I love.
Good write.
Banna.
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awwe thats wonderfull!! as i was reading that i made me think about ha=ow hard it would be saying to my bestfriends and that made me relize that they are the ones worth livingfor!! TYSM for writing this!!
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Great Write
I was thinking about suicide when I was in my teens and sometimes in my twenties and in my thirties. I finaly relized one day I could not keep having these thoughts so I went to a shrink got on meds and there aren't that many dark days. I think everyone every now and then thinks about checking out. Suicide is a permenant solution to a teporary problem so I say to anyone who thinks about going before there time stick around you'll miss your next present tomarrow. Keep writing.
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LOVE IT!!!
I Love It
It Speaks Alot Of Pain Behind Eyes
I Love It How It All Focuses On Pain And Futration
I Just Love It In All
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don't do suicide pls...
Remeber that peoples love you...
By the way..Love ur poems..^^ -
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dont worry lol I'm okay
and thank you :]
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I am thankful that my brother-in-law wrote a note before he committed suicide, but of course wish that he would have read it and decided it was worth living after he wrote it. Life is worth living and there are so many people left behind who suffer when one decides they cannot go on. It is tunnel vision, like you mentioned in your poem, thinking that is the only answer to relieving their pain.
Anyhoo, so nice to visit your poem and see the warm thoughts you send to your friends, and that you are still here to write.
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Take
Take one day at a time. Look for the beauty in life and think of the future and how wonderful it may be. Your age is a plus though your heart may heart. In time it will heal
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wow, this is so sad, so much emotion, I am so glad that you folded this up and hid it away, you have so much talent! Congrats on the gold! and no matter what your friends sound like they will always be there for you.
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Thank God that doesn't cross your mind anymore.
Here my critique
Dearest close friends,
I’m writing this to tell you,
All of what happened,
And all of the truth.
Starts off like a normal suicide note and it sounds like you have something big to reveal.
You see, this problem,
The one that I had,
I couldn’t see the good,
But only the bad.
Love the rhyme and makes you wonder what kind of problem this is. Did you kill someone? Did you steal? what is it?
It all got really hard.
I couldn’t take it anymore.
So I ended my life,
Right here on this floor.
That is normal and people always feel this way. Some people are either pussies or everything's been going wrong lately not seeing that they have a choice.
There are a few people,
I’d like to say goodbye to.
Some I didn’t want to leave,
Reaper, especially you.
Who's Reaper? Love the flow and the rhyme.
Let's be honest you are 13 years old and it is going to be the worst time of your life so far.It will never be easy. The poem has a good flow and ienjoyed reading it.
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I love the rhythm in this....thank God you threw it away.
You got people who totally care....
[Sugar]
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thanks. :]
Yeah, reading wat people commented kinda showed me that I am loved. It was kinda nice :]
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i like it. but DONT EVER SCARE ME LIKE THAT AGAIN!!!!!!i love u too much to think about that ever happening!!!
love u lots
Em -
Whoa you scared the crap out of me!
Seriously... I didn't see this was for a contest until I was nearly done... phew!!! This was written so well, and I have no querrel with the contest starter to give you gold! This was AMAZING. I would seriously hope and pray you never consider this... you are already a friend to me and that would hurt. Trust me.. I get attached. XD But amazing poem in the end... truly moving.
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Thanks for commenting.
And don't worry that thought doesnt cross my mind, anymore.
:]
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Very interesting
And am glad you are not really checking out.
Peace out, love in! Breathe! Easy now. Slow. Breathe!
Happy New Year!
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thanks much!
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Very nice writing and a poem I can relate to...very vivid self reflection.
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thank you! ur comments mean alot!!
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I'm to lazy to fix my author notes so yeah.
The few I left our include:
Lisa (i love you! ur my best friend i just didnt write it in words!!)
my family
my mentor (ron)
Will
and few others but my sis is yelling at me ill finish my list laters -
wow good write honest emotions. glad it got tossed along with the idea of
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thank you :]
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hey that was realllly reallly good. i loves the emotion and i loved the twist at the end because you chose not to do it. good luck on the contest
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thank you and I did have fun :]
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You can read the hope in these words. Great write.
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thank u
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THIS IS AMAZING! it as soooooooo sad and almost brought a tear to my eye. but it was great. i love it a lot. the last part is what i've done with all my 'notes'. :[
WOW.
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Thanks Sami. Glad you didnt go through with any of them :]
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